What Children Learn from Their Parents' Marriage

By Judith P. Siegel

Book Overview

How are your children learning about intimacy? What are they seeing when they see your marriage in action? In this provocative new look at family dynamics, marriage and family therapist Judith P. Siegel asserts that the key to a child's healthy development is not simply the relationship he has with each parent but the perception he has of the relationship between his parents. It may be your marriage, says Siegel, but it is your child's blueprint for the intimate relationships he will form as an adult. Combining her own clinical work with the latest research on families and child development, Siegel identifies the key elements of marriage that provide critical information to children. They include: the degree to which the marriage is a priority; the level of mutual support, respect, and trust between husband and wife; how marital differences are negotiated and conflict resolved; and how friendship and affection are communicated. With significant ramifications for divorcing couples with children as well as intact families, What Children Learn from Their Parents' Marriage offers useful advice, illuminating examples, and insight for parents intent on building the solid foundation that all children need for a happy, emotionally secure future. We all know that our own marriages are largely influenced by those with which we grew up, but what we tend to forget is how our own children are being affected by the marriage they are witnessing. In this enlightening book, you will be able to learn more about the ways in which your marriage is affecting your child. Some of what you will read will offer confirmation that what is going on in your marriage is wonderful for your children; some areas may not be going as smoothly as you might like. But if your goal is to create a positive legacy of love for your children, this eye-opening book becomes essential reading.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0060191880
• ISBN13: 9780060191887
• Release Date: January 2000
• Publisher: Harper
• Length: 256 Pages
• Weight: 1.21 lbs.
• Dimensions: 9.3" x 0.9" x 6.1"

Customer Reviews

Good marriages make healthy children

It may not come as a shock to most parents that the lessons our children learn in childhood are carried with them throughout their lives, but what this book makes clear is how our own marriages form a blueprint from which all our children's future relationships will be built. Siegel creates a compelling narrative using lots of case histories and anecdotes, which makes this an easy read. She helps us identify not only what we are doing wrong in our marriage, but what we're doing right, which makes our foibles a lot easier to acknowledge. She also helps us to explore how deeply our own parents' marriage affected us. A very important book with a very important goal--"the opportunity to create a positive legacy of love for our children."

Children learn what they live

This book is excellent and really focuses on average families. What kids grown up living in their households is really a reflection on what their future goals will be as molded by their parents. It is a wonderful book to read if you are looking for a practical, easy to understand book on what you can do to make your marriage more wholesome and the reflection of that will set the pace for your children in the future and what choices they make for themselves. I highly recommend it.