The Sit Down: A Dark Comedy

By Patience Zero

El Jefe, The Don, The King, The Boss, Chief, Kingpin, Queenpin, Transpin, Theypin.

How does one become the leader of an organized crime syndicate? There is no YouTube tutorial on how to become a notorious gang leader, not that I have seen anyway. No handbook, no guide, no Instagram Content Creator posting tricks and tips about how to be the best Mob Boss you can be because, you know, it is what all the kids want to be these days. No step-by-step process outlined in Gangster for Dummies. So how does someone proceed to make their way to the pinnacle of a criminal organization? What does that look like? What is a Gangster? How is a Gangster defined?

Uncle Mick is a tall, 6-foot fellow who is dapper, dandy, and exceptionally fit for his age. His age is unknown but guessed to be in his 70s. He is bald, with very little hair around his bald head. The few hairs are white. The hair is wild when not wearing a hat. His bald head is discolored in various polka dots. He enjoys eating at various local restaurants, occasionally spilling a tiny smudge of condiment on his trousers or shirt. He would usually attempt to get rid of these smudges with a wet napkin leaving a larger wet mark that was more noticeable than the original smudge. Uncle Mick is not Irish. He likes women and their features. He likes death and misery.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: B0G1LYXWWM
• ISBN13: 9798265928832
• Release Date: November 2025
• Publisher: Independently Published
• Length: 298 Pages
• Weight: 0.88 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 6.0" x 9.0"