Bleach, Burn, and Banter
Sometimes the best way to save yourself is to burn it all down.
Nina Smith thought she had a predictable, twenty-two-year marriage until she unzipped her husband's golf bag and found a cheap burner phone. After discovering twenty-six months of text messages between her husband, Rex, and a much younger woman named Hannah, Nina decides she is entirely done playing the dutiful wife.
Instead of crying, she gets to work. She uses industrial bleach to destroy his custom suits, shreds his ties in the garbage disposal, and drags his prized $1,500 oxblood leather recliner into the backyard fire pit.
Enter Alan Randal, the rugged, retired fire captain next door who has been quietly keeping his distance for eleven years. Instead of stopping her neighborhood bonfire, Alan calmly offers her a lighter, a beer, and instructions on how to burn the chair safely.
As Nina legally reclaims her maiden name, starts a massive backyard vegetable garden, and re-launches her graphic design business, Rex quickly realizes his new life in a cramped apartment with Hannah isn't what he wanted. He wants to come home. But Nina isn't looking back-she's too busy enjoying her sweet revenge and finding out that exactly what she needs might just be on the other side of the fence.
Bleach, Burn, and Banter is a hilarious, triumphant story of midlife awakening, shedding dead weight, and discovering that your best chapters are still ahead of you.
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