When Helping You is Hurting Me

by Carmen Renee Berry

Book Overview

Do you find yourself trapped in a relationship where you do all the giving and the other person does all the taking? If, so you have fallen into the Messiah Trap. This book is your ticket out. This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Mass Market Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0061040010
• ISBN13: 9780061040016
• Release Date: January 1995
• Publisher: HarperOne
• Length: 203 Pages
• Weight: 0.28 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 4.2" x 6.7"

Customer Reviews

when Helping you is hurting me.

When Helping You is Hurting Me is an excellent resource for people who find themselves repeating a distructive pattern of "Helping too Much". The misnomer is that we are taught to help others and keep on giving and when we've been raised that way it is not easy to stop even when we fall on our faces. I found this to be a real "KEY" to my own healing and understanding of why I did what I did for so long even at the risk of my own health and happiness. Thanks to the author for such insights and research. Faye Hobbs, Transformational Learning

The Challenge of Helping

As author of "Baaad Sheep- When God's People Let You Down (CarePoint, 2007) I quoted Ms. Berry several times. When someone mentioned a situation in which a loved one was being controlled and manipulated by a very needy individual, I suggested the book and it was purchased for the church library to help whoever might be in a similar situation. Christians "naturally" want to help others- the challenge is helping a person in a long-term way to be dependent on Christ, rather than stepping in with short-term solutions that may actually hurt us emotionally and delay the work God wishes to complete in the other person.

Brilliant depiction of group dynamics

Another of my favorites. Has been out of print for awhile and am glad to see it back. Carmen Berry depicts a brilliant example of group dynamics and personality styles. Gives you permission to set your own boundaries.

A very useful book

Goes over the problem in detail, but without excessive hand-wringing. A diversity of well selected examples, with helpful discussions and observations. If codependence and "rescuing" people are issues you struggle with, definitely get this book!