Saving Millie; a daughter's story of surviving her mother's schizophrenia

By Tina Kotulski

For Tina Kotulski, daughter of a mentally ill mother, surviving the bizarre landscape of schizophrenia came at a price. Her traumatic childhood, overshadowed by her mother's unpredictable and often... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0977911519
• ISBN13: 9780977911516
• Release Date: November 2006
• Publisher: Extraordinary Voices Press
• Length: 248 Pages
• Weight: 0.95 lbs.
• Dimensions: 8.8" x 0.8" x 5.5"

Customer Reviews

Should be required reading for social workers and those going into counseling, child psychology and

Ignore the pink and grey cover and the pink rose -- this is a memoir that should have a picture of a burned-out house on the cover and be required reading for those in social work, elementary school teaching and counseling. The author, Tina Kotulski, describes growing up with a mother who is a paranoid schizophrenic and details how her mental illness scarred her, her father and her sister. Her mother Millie was a bright, attractive woman whose behavior deteriorated around the age of 25; soon after the birth of her first daughter. Her husband soon left and their two daughters were left to be cared for by this now mentally ill woman who was incapable of taking care of herself, never mind two beautiful little girls. Tina Koyulski tells the story of what happened after the father left. The verbal and physical abuse, the loss of financial support, of how they learned to live with rarely -- if ever -- hearing the words "I love you." It's a harsh reality for all concerned, but impressive in that both girls somehow survived and managed to move forward to successful lives. The most interesting part of the story is her description of how Tina found herself -- as a child -- trying to alter her own moods, behavior and beliefs to make her mother's irrational behavior true and accurate. If her mother was thinking that others were spying on them and listening to their conversations, then -- to gain her mother's love and acceptance -- she would believe her and act as if it were true. This offers readers a better explanation as to why children involved in families where the caregiver is an alcoholic, drug addict or is mentally ill, cannot "let go" and accurately describe to social workers, the police or others exactly what is going on in their world. Or, why they fear and attack those outside the family who try to save them from their circumstances. There's an honesty to this story and the photographs that accompanies it that is seldom found in books by and about survivors. The visual descriptions ring true and the emotional depth make one feel sorrow for the many thousands of children who deal with such parents who are not only unable to care for them, but treat them horribly. The author's sister, Susan Smiley, became a documentary filmmaker and spend several years making a documentary about the family titled "Out of the Shadow." While this reviewer has not had the opportunity to view the film, a search on the internet reveals very positive reviews. Tina Kotulski's book is highly recommended to faculty as a supplemental text for students who intending to work in any of the "helping professions": nursing, sociology, social work, counseling, psychology and police science. Also, it's a well-written and worthy addition to public library and college/university library collections. R. Neil Scott Middle Tennessee State University

A Great Book

Thank you for a in depth book about schitzophrenia. I have suffered from depression for a long time and understand the pain and agony. Thank you for writing this book for others to read and maybe understand a bit more than they did before.

Heartbreakingly Real

The author captured so well the joy and pain associated with a family member w/ a chronic mental illness. Having first hand knowledge of what that is like, I applaud her for relating the real story; not glossing over how horrible it can be for both the person with the illness and the family members. She also lovingly showed that despite the nightmares, stress and frustration, there is love; love that can sustain, love that can heal, and love that enables us to have hope. Wonderful book!