Refuse to Choose!: A Revolutionary Program for Doing Everything That You Love

by Barbara Sher

Book Overview

Don't know what to do with your life? Drawn to so many things that you can't choose just one? New York Times best-selling author Barbara Sher has the answer--do EVERYTHING "Designed to help you enjoy... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1594863032
• ISBN13: 9781594863035
• Release Date: March 2006
• Publisher: Rodale Books
• Length: 270 Pages
• Weight: 0.61 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.0" x 6.4" x 9.2"

Customer Reviews

Scanners of the world, unite!

It seems to me that the two extremely negative reviews on this book came from people who not only are not scanners, but refuse to believe they exist. That being said, I think everyone needs to read this book whether he/she is a scanner or not. As Barbara says in the book, what happened to the Renaissance Man/Woman? Why all of a sudden must we specialize if it makes us miserable? Her suggestions for how to cope with being a scanner are excellent. At least it gives us a framework to channel our talents. It also will help non-Scanners understand who we are and why we operate the way we do.

Read the Book and Joined the Forum

This is a really good book. You need to read it if you are someone who has so many interests you can't seem to get anything done. If everyone you know says you just never grew up and settled down then you are probably a Scanner. Do you have so many interests the books and papers pile up? Do you constantly find things that interest you and you never seem to be able to finish them? You are almost certainly a Scanner, and you need to hear what Barbara Sheer has to say. It can make a big difference. I was so impressed that I went to her forum at barbarasher.com and signed up. I don't usually like forums because they are a big waste of time. Here people are asking questions, making interesting remarks, and helping each other. It gives you a little insight into yourself just to know there are plenty of other people with the same kind of challenges as yourself, and you might be able to give them some ideas about how you solved a similar situation for yourself. I do not like self-help books. Everyone has an idea about how you should run your life. This book is not like that. It is more like some basic information on a type of person that receives little or no affirmation in our culture. These people, as Barbara points out, are some of the most creative people around. Their problem, if it is really a problem, is that they cannot give up on pursuing other creative interests that most people give up to concentrate on or two. This book tells you how you can do all those things that really interest you. If you know someone like that you should read the book and pass it on to them. They will probably love you for it. I wish I had found it twenty years ago.

This is the book I have been searching for all of my life!

First of all, I am not a friend of Barbara Sher. I have taken one of her idea classes and have seen her on Public Television. (In case you reader think I am a friend or family member) What I have ALWAYS been is confused. I am not stupid--actually more on the intellectual side. I have varied interests in the Pre-Raphaelites, travel,hockey, making mosaics, growing a garden, politics, writing, being healthy, quirky little English movies etc etc. And instead of picking one career..I have found myself in menial jobs--retail, shelving books at a library, working reservations for a major airline, temp jobs with insurance companies etc etc. And I am still barely over minimum wage, intellegent and having friends wonder what is wrong with me--or asking if I had ADD. That could be MANY of you..and I bet if you are looking for this book...you have a sneaking suspicion that you don't need ritalin..but you need some TOOLS to help you be the successful person that you want to be. This is the book you have been looking for. Yes, you have diverse interests and your family has poo pooed them..and told you to grow up. You have not understood why. Sadly, it is because you are a scanner--a renaissance person like Leonardo or Thomas Jefferson or Barbara Sher herself. A hundred years ago you would have been admired, now the norm is having a one track mind. This book is to not only identify your status as a Scanner but to also use it to your advantage. Barbara is a great teacher with years of experience working with people struggling to figure out what their dream work is. This book is for those of us who dream of living a life with lots of variety and still able to pay the bills. Although I have just recently read her book, I finally feel some clarity and none of the inactivity from feeling overwhelmed by my need to keep my life varied. Years ago, I was encouraged to test for ADD and did not qualify for Ritalin. Now I realize that it is not ritalin that I needed--I needed Barbara Sher and this book.

Outstanding!

I read Barbara's "It's Only Too Late If You Don't Start Now" at the ripe old age of 34, after suffering a Traumatic Brain Injury and needing to re-design my whole life to fit my new needs- It SAVED MY LIFE! I have since read each and every one of her books, and handed out copies like a crazed zealot! I think that I am single-handedly keeping Barbara in vacations! (Assuming she even DOES vacations, Somehow, I see her on a constant, driven .... Purpose-Spree... no time for vacation!):c) Each and every person I've given a book to has reported back to me that reading them has changed their lives, added purpose, re-directed, and given them the "permission" they needed to live what they really wanted all along- AND, more importantly- to figure out what that is! This book is no different! I have been passionately torn in many directions for most of my life, paralyzed by the fear of committing to any single passion, for fear of letting go of the basket-fulls of others. This book not only explains WHY, but gives direction, purpose, focus and validation to these feelings. It's not a bad thing, it's fine! It's WONDERFUL! And WORKABLE! And...I don't need to relinquish ANY dreams or passions! Now... If I could convince Barbara to come over to my house for coffee- perhaps for vacation?!

Finally!

Barbara Sher offers encouragement and guidance to those of us who don't know what we want to "be when we grow up." A fellow "scanner," she commiserates with our need to scan the horizon for new challenges and discoveries, and with the burdening notion that, if we stick with just one thing, we'll miss out on something better. Ultimately, Barbara gives scanners permission to say, "I won't do only one thing - I'll do it all." The book is filled with guidance and various techniques that scanners can apply to our lives, based on which type of scanner we are (it's refreshing to know that we don't fit neatly into the same package). Barbara describes the various types at length so that even the most indecisive scanner will identify with only one or two the categories. It turns out that I'm a wanderer: someone who is drawn to so many disparate types of activities that it seems my life lacks direction and form. Though, after reading Barbara's book, I realize that my "wanderings" aren't random - that all along they've had a theme and have followed a precise path. By completing the exercises in the book, I've discovered what that theme is and have decided to compile my journey into a collection of personal essays. Don't waste any more time trying to wrangle yourself down a career path that doesn't work for you. Barbara reminds us that when we understand ourselves, we can be free to what we were born to do. Good luck!