I know you have heard about the masked heroes who fight cruel villains and save beautiful people. Now, as tempting as it might be to want to jump over buildings, have super speed, or be able to turn into a large green fighting machine, I urge you to take a second thought. This story is not about the superheroes you have read about before. This story is about all those superpowers that went very wrong.
With the disasters you're about to read, I suggest that you...Never...Ever...Under any circumstances...Wish for superpowers.