Layer Cake

By J.J. Connolly

Book Overview

Our narrator's too smart to tell you his name ("if I did], you'd be as clever as me"), but he's not afraid to tell you everything else about the "layer cake"--London's intricately arranged constellation of underworld fiefdoms. The worst thing about drug dealing--according to our unnamed narrator--whether you're a classy top dealer trading millions or a down-and-out street pusher, is that you have to relate to a lot of total idiots - loudmouths and tough-guy wannabes who aren't afraid to "get nicked by old bill and thrown in the boob" (arrested by police and jailed). Our narrator is a smoothly diplomatic 29-year-old cocaine dealer who has earned a respected place among England's Mafia elite. Speaking in a language rich with drug jargon, vulgarities, British slang, and Cockneyisms, he manages high-level trafficking with a tough old veteran partner, Mister Mortimer, a man who gave the narrator his start in the business, and who has seen his share of prison (five and a half year term) and deadly fights (he owns a porn store, and loves to set up guys looking for child porn by directing them to come back at a special time, then beating the living daylights out of them when they return). Our narrator's goal is to retire at 30 and spend his remaining years far from the danger and double-dealing of London's crime gangs. But like most high rollers, he finds it hard to walk away from "just one more" deal.

Morty rings up our narrator one early Saturday morning with an invitation to an exclusive members only restaurant far off in the English countryside. They're off for "a spot of luncheon" with the Don, Jimmy Price. Jimmy is a legend, a crime boss who's been in the business for years by hiring the best lawyers and keeping a low-key profile. This is a man who is always gets what he wants, and is not used to people refusing him favors. Which is exactly the spot our narrator soon finds himself in when over lunch, Jimmy hands down a tough assignment: find Charlotte Ryder, the missing rich princess daughter of Jimmy's old pal Edward, a powerful construction business player and gossip papers socialite. It's a hard deal to refuse, but Jimmy can spot the edge on our narrator and makes him a deal - if you find Charlotte, you can leave the life for good.

Our narrator sets out to find Billy Bogus, a grifter with a gift for mimicry and ingratiating himself into any area of society he wants. Bank and credit card fraud is his trade, with a healthy dollop of hustling young women out of their trust funds for good measure. On his way to meet Bogus, he runs into a small time punk named Sid in a local nightclub who runs with a band of thugs called "the Yahoos." With him is a stunning woman, a "real love-a-player type" named Tammy. Sid tells our narrator a bloody story about a friend of his named "The Duke" who recently got ambushed by a state of the art crew armed with laser sighted Uzis. Our narrator won't figure out the significance of this story until later as he's too busy checking out Tammy, who flirtatiously gives him her number while Sid is distracted.

Our narrator reports to Jimmy's right hand man, Gene, that he's on the case, but Gene has other business. Turns out that the Yahoos have two million pounds' worth of Grade A ecstasy to sell, and Gene wants our narrator to handle the deal. It's an irresistible deal, just the right amount of money to top off his retirement fund. He sets up a meeting with him, Mort, and the Yahoos kingpins, Big Frankie and JD while finally catching up with Billy Bogus, who agrees to help find our narrator Charlotte by tracking down Charlotte's boyfriend Kinky--for a price, of course.

Big Frankie and JD keep quiet about where they've gotten the tablets, but the "gear" is top quality, confirmed by none other than Sir Alex ("chief chemical taster"). Things are looking up when Mort sets up his gang to meet up with a crew, headed by a man named Trevor, up in Northern England who he thinks will be perfect to unload the goods on. There's only one problem - they don't want the goods. This crew informs our narrator that an Ecstasy factory has been hijacked--most likely by the Yahoos--and now a brutal neo-Nazi sect wants those pills back. They've already hit up a house that belongs to "the Duke", and here is where Sid's story from the club all makes sense.

Our narrator drives back to London with Mort in tow and gets a call from Bogus, who tells him he's found Kinky. Dead. In a London housing project. It looks like a typical drug overdose, but a young kid drug dealer who helped Bogus find Kinky says he was murdered.

Meanwhile, our narrator sets up a rendezvous with Tammy in a hotel room. As he steps out of the shower, two toughs ambush him, who roll him up in a carpet, and abduct him in a long box. The toughs take him to a construction site to meet with their boss, Eddie Ryder, Charlotte's father. Eddie tells our narrator that Jimmy Price has pulled a fast one on him - his daughter's isn't missinnnnnng. What's worse, Jimmy's made a deal with some renegade Chechens that have swindled him to the tune of thirteen million pounds. To pull himself out of the hole, he set up the narrator to find Eddie's daughter, then hold her for ransom. The double cross, though, turns into a triple cross when Eddie plays our narrator a tape that reveals Jimmy Price is an informer for the police and has set up a sting for our narrator where he plans to send him to jail for long time, and make off with the narrator's retirement fund.

Finding himself undercut, double-crossed, hung out to dry, and struggling to survive, our narrator's survival instincts kick in. He changes from a turn-the-other-cheek diplomat to a revenge-charged hit man overnight, starting by killing Jimmy Price. Next, he agrees to sell the ecstasy tablets to Ryder, who plans to unload them to the Yakuza in Japan, which will put a nice chunk of change in our narrator's pocket. Just before he leaves, our narrator mentions a

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0802141684
• ISBN13: 9780802141682
• Release Date: August 2004
• Publisher: Grove Press, Black Cat
• Length: 344 Pages
• Weight: 0.83 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.6" x 8.4"

Customer Reviews

Great book for you geezers!

If you liked the movie you'll enjoy the book the movie was based on! For a US reader it takes time to get all the UK slang down, but it is well worth it.

Snatch meets Dutch

This novel comes across like a Guy Ritchie movie crossed with an book by Elmore Leonard. Very enjoyable and engaging. I'll have to check out the British movie when it hits Canada.

Guess I should hop on the bandwagon fast

I picked up this book on a whim during a recent trip to London and quickly became immersed in the mesmerizing 'layer cake' world of J.J. Connolly's 29-year-old nameless protagonist. It's neat to see Connolly's writing stretch to 300+ pages while artfully avoiding ever having to drop the character name in there somewhere. And it's that writing that will keep you glued to 'Layer Cake' from the start. It takes you a bit - especially the US-raised reader - to adjust to the writing style (replete with Cockney rhyming slang - "I don't have a Scooby" you find out is "I don't have a clue"....Scooby = Scooby Doo = clue), but once you do, it's an enthralling ride. Can't wait to see Matthew Vaughn - producer of Guy Ritchie's first two films - step into the director's chair on this one. Connolly was smart to tab Vaughn as "one of the few people in Britain who could get my movie made." It promises to be a good pairing.

The best British crime novel I've ever read

I first came across Connolly through a short story of his I quite liked in the Britpulp! anthology. With his fist full novel he delivers on that early promise with the best British crime novel I've ever read. While I often enjoy traditional procedurals like John Harvey's Charlie Resnik series, have been known to enjoy Agatha Christie in my younger days, Jake Arnott's The Long Firm and He Kills Coppers, and quite like a lot of the pulpy/noirish stuff put out by The Do Not Press these days-this leaves them all in the dust. The book follows an unnamed narrator over two weeks in 1997 as he plots to end his criminal days and retire on his thirtieth birthday-of course there's just that one last job to take care of...The thing you notice right away is the language. Nonstop patter, stories, and more slang than you can shake a stick at. The rhythms of the language, both descriptive and dialogue, is perfect and unique. The best comparison I can make is with some of Irvine Welsh's stuff-it's English, but unlike any English you or I speak. And like Welsh's stuff, it can be hard to follow for those not up on the argot (especially cockney rhyming slang), so be warned. But if you like the language, you fall in love with the characters. Finally, some honest to god smart criminals who understand that being low-key is the smoothest path to riches. There must be at least fifty characters in the novel and Connolly gives each one a distinctive voice, even if they're only around for a page. Once you've absorbed the amazing language and characterization, you'll be swept away by the authenticity. The entire book takes place in the criminal underworlds of London and Liverpool, with details on international drug trafficking, porn shops, killings, and on and on. The book immerses the reader in that world more so than any crime novel I've come across, and you have to wonder what Connolly's been up to in his life to be able to conjure such a setting from his head. It's not a world for the faint of heart, but one that's compelling to read about-more like The Long Good Friday than Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels. Finally, there's the expert plotting. Built on that classic premise of a gangster looking to get out of the game, Connolly's plot twists and turns with complications that keep boxing in the narrator until the inevitable climax. From start to finish, it's the best novel about British organized crime around.

Fast, furious and funny

This first novel gets off to a zippy start and never lets up for a moment; with devious twists and turns, a cast of great (often mercurial, sometimes downright psycho) characters, and a whole lot of detail about the drug scene in England (which may or may not be accurate but certainly comes across with authenticity). Most North Americans, however, will find it difficult to comprehend, as Cockney rhyming slang and slang in general comprise so much of the book. That said, within its own context, there's an almost musical perfection to the cadence of the writing--especially the dialogue. The editing, however, leaves a great deal to be desired. There are far too many errors in maintaining spelling consistency and in simple grammar. But once into Layer Cake, it's one of those books that's all but impossible to put down. Most highly recommended.