Knowing Stephanie

By Stephanie Byram

Photographs by Charlee Brodsky

Stephanie Byram was an active, athletic young woman entering the prime of her life. She held dreams of earning her doctorate, pursing a career, falling in love, and starting a family. A doctor's visit, shortly after her thirtieth birthday, changed everything.

She had been concerned about a painful, swollen right breast, and tests confirmed the presence of a tumor. Stephanie was diagnosed with highly aggressive, highly malignant breast cancer-Stage IIIb infiltrative ductal carcinoma-and within two months she underwent a double mastectomy. Doctors gave her a 50 percent chance of surviving five years.

Despite this prognosis, Stephanie looked to the future, and refused to be deterred by the obstacles thrown suddenly into her path. Though she was rarely cancer-free and suffered recurrences that were progressively more invasive and damaging to her body, over the course of the next eight years she would live a life of her choosing.

Stephanie fell in love, married, and bought a home. She earned her Ph.D., and even found the time and energy to revise her dissertation topic to how women make medical decisions after they have been diagnosed with life-threatening illnesses. She traveled to London, Tibet, and Hawaii; went on safari in Zambia and Botswana, rang in the millennium atop the Great Barrier Reef; hiked the grueling, thirty-five-mile Inca trail to Machu Picchu on her honeymoon, just weeks after a devastating recurrence; and visited the Grand Canyon before her death in June 2001.

Stephanie came to appreciate the details and experiences found in a typical day. Learning to live in the moment, she found joy while playing with her cats, tending her garden, observing the birds jostling at the feeder, walking in the park by moonlight, laughing with friends. And running.

Always an avid runner, Stephanie placed even greater importance on the sport following her diagnosis. She vowed to be the first person to run in each Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure, and would eventually run in thirty out of sixty-one events. To help publicize this uncommon feat, she approached Charlee Brodsky about taking some photographs for inclusion in a press packet. What eventually evolved was much more.

As their working relationship grew, so did their bond. Stephanie was Brodsky's subject, but they became collaborators and closer friends. They developed art exhibitions, a video, and often gave lectures, presentations, and inspirational talks to groups across the country. And, now, together they have created this book. Knowing Stephanie combines Brodsky's photographs and Stephanie's dialogue, which along with Jennifer Matesa's biographical essay, "Reconstructing a Life," paints a complete and compelling portrait of an extraordinary woman.

For Stephanie, this project was an opportunity to visualize herself-her life and her body-differently. According to Brodsky, "She was able to transform her profound disappointment with the cards she was dealt into a life that was about living." In so doing, Stephanie has provided a treasure for us all.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0822942127
• ISBN13: 9780822942122
• Release Date: May 2003
• Publisher: University of Pittsburgh Press
• Length: 144 Pages
• Weight: 2.00 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.6" x 9.8" x 10.4"

Customer Reviews

A Beautiful Gift

"My body and soul do not function as separate parts. I pieced together a new self, unified and wonderfully alive." ~Stephanie Byram "Knowing Stephanie" is a beautiful gift and I am amazed at how a woman I will never meet in this life has affected my life in a profound way. I am also deeply touched by the sheer beauty of the souls who surrounded Stephanie during a time when she became so very human and vulnerable. Stephanie had a dream for her life. She was pursuing a career and wanted to start a family when her life turned into a nightmare instead of the dream she had envisioned. After becoming concerned about a painful, swollen breast, all the tests showed the presence of a tumor. At the young at of 33, she was diagnosed with a highly aggressive breast cancer. Doctors said she only had a 50 percent chance of surviving five years. Stephanie refused to see this situation as an obstacle to her dreams. Although she struggled with cancer for eight years, she decided to get married, buy a home, earn her Ph.D. and even travel the world. Stephanie didn't give up on life because life decided to take her on a path that would show her the limits of her own endurance. Knowing Stephanie is a combination of Charlee Brodsky's photographs and Stephanie Byram's words. There is also an wonderful essay by Jennifer Matesa to give us a story of the medical journey without being overly clinical. In "Reconstructing a Life" we learn how Stephanie found out about her cancer and how chemotherapy works. We finally understand what causes the nausea and why patients undergoing chemo go bald and experience neutropenia. In this collaborative effort, you will meet Stephanie and learn about her struggles. You will see how she took charge of her own life and relive the experiences of chemotherapy and doctor visits through photographs. There are also beautiful notes from her mother, father and niece. She makes of list of everything her friends and family did to help her including telling her is was "OK to cry." Stephanie had weaknesses and strengths and both are portrayed in this story. We are invited to share her love of gardening, the feelings she experiences as she wondered how men would accept her after her surgery, how she is suddenly confronted with her mortality and how she uses the experiences in her life to heal instead of withdrawing into the darkness of despair. A portrait of a woman who refused to see cancer as anything less than an opportunity to embrace life in all its beauty and sadness and learn from the experience. Her optimism and determination is an inspiration to us all. "What is my future: love, laughter, gardens, family, friends, spirituality, travel ...more of what I love in life. I surround myself with positivity, gentleness, challenge, and hope. I be, I am, until I pass, as we all shall." ~ Stephanie Byram ~The Rebecca Review