In All My Lives: How One Love Changed Me and What Remained Afterward
A love can change a life. Sometimes not because it lasts - but because it makes you question everything you thought you knew about yourself.
At fifty, Silviu believes he knows his own life. He has built something for himself, knows responsibility, loss, and new beginnings - as well as the security of a long-term relationship in which many things have remained, except passion.
Then Fernando appears.
A doctor. Intelligent, intense, contradictory. A man who, in a remarkably short time, creates a closeness that feels deeper than anything that came before.
One message turns into daily conversations. Conversations turn into trips, promises, and plans. Longing becomes the vision of a life together.
But the closer Fernando gets, the harder he becomes to understand.
Caught between extraordinary tenderness and sudden withdrawal, between sweeping promises of a future together and unsettling distance, Silviu begins pouring more and more of himself into trying to hold on to a man who makes him feel, at the same time, that he has finally come home - and that everything could disappear at any moment.
When Fernando finally comes to Switzerland, their future together seems closer than ever.
A few days later, nothing is the same.
In All My Lives is a novel about a love of extraordinary intensity, emotional dependency, hope, fear, and the dangerous temptation to try to save another person.
But at its core, this book is about something else: how easy it is to lose yourself in another person - and how difficult it can be to find your way back to yourself afterward.
What remains of a love when the person is gone - but what they changed inside you remains?
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