Imperfect Control: Our Lifelong Struggles with Power and Surrender

By Judith Viorst

Book Overview

In her remarkable national bestseller, Necessary Losses, Judith Viorst explored how we are shaped by the various losses we experience throughout our lives. Now, in her wise and perceptive new book, Imperfect Control, she shows us how our sense of self and all our important relationships are colored by our struggles over control: over wanting it and taking it, loving it and fearing it, and figuring out when the time has come to surrender it.
Writing with compassion, acute psychological insight, and a touch of her trademark humor, Viorst invites us to contemplate the limits and possibilities of our control. She shows us how our lives can be shaped by our actions and our choices. She reminds us, too, that we sometimes should choose to let go. And she encourages us to find our own best balance between power and surrender.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0684848147
• ISBN13: 9780684848143
• Release Date: March 1999
• Publisher: Simon & Schuster
• Length: 448 Pages
• Weight: 0.92 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.3" x 5.5" x 8.5"

Customer Reviews

a "must" for everyone

if you have read "necessary losses" from the same author, and also if you have'nt, this book is a must for all of us. mrs. viorst has a clear and direct style with a good sense of humor. do yourself a favor and buy now!!

Thoughtful Viorst, Again

I've been reading Judith Viorst for years -- first reading "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-good Very Bad Day" to my children, a book in itself about imperfect control -- but somehow missed this one until recently. There are many valuable sections, but the one on being a parent of adult children especially resonated with me. (I am horrified to hear the words -- unasked for -- of advice that seem to escape my mouth.) She approaches this section with her usual wry humor, and stories of her own stuggles with letting go of attempts to control her adult sons. Whether a parent or not, there is much in this book to assist a reader in making peace with their lives, and hopefully making some better decisions about what we CAN control, while letting go of what we can't. The chapter on death is worth the price of the book; I expect I will be re-reading it now and then. (It propelled me to update my Power of Attorney for medical decisions, since some laws have changed since last done.)

Worth a look

This book has very good summaries of psychological research on the issues of power and control. It would be a particularly helpful book for a student writing a paper in an undergraduate class. The book is not hard to read; I finished it in 2 days. I found her chapters on romantic relationships, parenting and work relationships helpful and gained insight into my own behaviour.

A lot of theory !

I saw Judith interviewed on Oprah and decided to read her book. I was finishing up my master's degree at that time and found it to have a lot of theories of control that went on and on. Her interview made the book seem more practical for info on control issues. If you are into theories and origination of how issues evolve, this is the book for you!