Endless Knot: A Spiritual Odyssey Through Sado-Masochism

By Mathew Styranka and Mathew Stryanka

Bay Street clerk by day, fetish slave by night, Endless Knot is the autobiographical story of one man's spiritual journey through Toronto's underworld of hard-core sado-masochism. Growing up in... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1894663101
• ISBN13: 9781894663106
• Release Date: September 2001
• Publisher: Insomniac Press
• Length: 160 Pages
• Weight: 0.36 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.4" x 5.1" x 8.6"

Customer Reviews

FANTASY VS. REALITY

This is a wise, thoughtful, thought-provoking book that is essentially about pursuing the things that we think will bring us pleasure, happiness, fulfillment, wholeness. In this sense, the issues raised by Mathew Styranka are not solely related to sex and fetish desires, but can be equally applied to almost all other aspects of life. Curiously, however, even though Zen figures prominently into Styranka's story, there is no mention between karma and his fetish needs and his relationship with ''Lara'' his dream/nightmare mistress of several years. He also writes of ''the dangers this lifestyle entails'' but then does not explain them. Maybe these questions aren't crucial to the overall story, but they did emerge in my reading. Too, there are at least a handful of misspellings that distract momentarily. After this fetish cycle in his life, Styranka does seem to have reached a core understanding of his being-ness -- that no one, and no thing, beyond yourself can bring you happiness or wholeness. What's more, our perceived needs can amount to a kind self-imprisonment and self-torture as a result of thoughts. It's not easy to be free, aware, awake, present. In the beginning of the book, he quotes an old man as saying, ''You can't teach people lessons.'' If there's any main lesson of this book, perhaps it's that: you have to learn the lessons yourself. And one way to do that, as Styranka writes in his author's note, is to live your ''dreams, fantasies and life to the fullest, always with a questioning mind, in search of Truth.'' Bravo to Mathew Styranka for sharing his journey.

A fine book

I also thoroughly enjoyed this book, an account of a period in Styranka's life that many may fantasize about but few come close to living. Styranka's writing is clear and almost conversational as he narrates his fetish and submissive lifestyle as a young adult, interwoven with zen practice. This book was hard to put down. There is one frustration, however. Styranka became the willing slave of a beautiful lesbian who was capable of considerable emotional and physical cruelty. Despite her physical perfection, his mistress was a person who turned out to be the victim of childhood abuse that she didn't want to deal with. There's an emotional disconnect between them, despite descriptions of good times they also enjoyed. There were times when I wished I could climb into the story and ask him why he stayed in the relationship for as long as he did. Hopefully, a healthier BDSM relationship wouldn't involve the non-negotiated abuse Styranka endured. At the end of the book, he suggests that he has found one. An excellent, honest book.

Thought provoking

I found this book grabbed my interest and I couldn't put it down until I read it twice. The appeal of this book lies in the author's ability to translate his pursuit of the fullfilment of his fetish into the universal condition of humanity. It makes you re examine your search for happiness and materialism. It illustrates the truth in the age old cliche "beware of what you ask for because you might just get it". Sometimes what we think we want is just blocking the truth of who we are. Styranka's writing is direct, unpretentious and a pleasure to read. I really reccomend this book!!

WOW!

I thoroughly enjoyed Endless Knot. It was an easy read, honest, descriptive and emotional rather than intellectual, which allowed me to connect with it. I cried a couple of times as I could relate to the author's experiences. The juxtaposition of the author's spiritual life and his life in the fetish world is beyond fasinating. A submissive slave with a foot fetish he was, but he had the guts to ask all the big questions. My boyfriend loved it too!