Unpremeditated Regret

By Yogen Thomas

'Unpremeditated Regret' is a story of post-divorce heartbreak, pain, solitude, and the journey of struggle of rejuvenation of life of a thirty-five years old man called 'Negoy'. It is believed that it's always women who suffer most or get the victim of post-divorce trauma and unfathomable sadness; whereas men move on easily, but for 'Negoy' it was the other way round. 'Negoy' was so heartbroken after his separation from his wife that he had no idea when and how his life changed drastically upside down suddenly. Though, it was he, who sparked the first flames of separation thinking that it would bring him happiness. But now; he couldn't understand why this separation was hurting him so much that it made him so heartbroken that he had no idea in which direction his life was going.

After the separation, he discovers that he was in love with his wife all the time but mistakenly ended up motivating her to get separated from him. The separation took place two months ago as the first lockdown started in Germany due to the outbreak of the Coronavirus pandemic. As the time passed, he found himself missing his wife intensively. 'Negoy' had to move out of his wife's house and live in a working/student hostel. He wanted to find out why his wife had no pain after the separation, Afterall, she used to love him so much. Only after two weeks, he finds out that his wife had a new boyfriend after the separation.Corona lockdowns and his heartbreak made him take risks that he could hardly afford to. Furthermore, Corona lockdowns and not having any single friend to share his situation left him no opportunity to recover from his situation. The challenge before him now was to come out of the dreadful situation. He knew that if he wanted to survive and not die soon, he had to somehow come out of that situation, but he had so many challenges that every determination would collapse in two days. He would sometimes embrace and enjoy the one-sided love which has emerged in him for his wife along with going through a drastic pain, and the danger of losing the job and so on. He would hug the walls of his tiny room of the hostel and cry out loud amidst the noise of running cars and buses outside his building. Or sometimes he would spread his arms towards the night sky under the stars while smoking on the balcony and mummer his wife's name into the air. He found out that he loves his wife more than ever after the separation and burns into the fire of detachment from her with no hope of her coming back because of someone else's involvement in her life.

At times he felt like the character of Tom Hanks from the movie "Cast Away". He had a long way to go to heal himself physically and mentally and come back to life with a forgiven unpremeditated regret. "Unpremeditated Regret" is a story of unwilling wrong judgments of things in life, self-destruction, self-motivation, and self-rejuvenation. This is the story of journey of 'Negoy' of losing himself once and then finding himself again.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: B0CKKJ2HFZ
• ISBN13: 9798863267869
• Release Date: October 2023
• Publisher: Independently Published
• Length: 300 Pages
• Weight: 0.76 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 5.3" x 8.0"