The Unwritten Rules of Friendship: Simple Strategies to Help Your Child Make Friends

by Natalie Madorsky Elman and Eileen Kennedy-Moore

Book Overview

This practical and compassionate handbook helps parents sharpen any child's social skills by identifying the "unwritten rules" that govern all relationships.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0316917303
• ISBN13: 9780316917308
• Release Date: September 2003
• Publisher: Little Brown and Company
• Length: 340 Pages
• Weight: 1.90 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.9" x 5.4" x 8.3"

Customer Reviews

Wish my parents had this when I was a kid

As a shy child who had troubles making friends, this book would have been enormously helpful. I bought it because I realized my daughter was having the same problems I used to have, and I felt helpless to know what to tell her to help her. I didn't want her to suffer as I had, but I wasn't exactly qualified to tell another person how to make friends! I am so glad I got this book. It is full of practical, detailed advice on what you can do to teach your child social skills. I'm finding it useful too! I would recommend it whole-heartedly to anyone who is in the same situation I was in.

required reading

This book has an eye-catching title, but really the title suggests just a small portion of what this book provides. A real look at how to really raise children with different emotional needs, treating them like individuals and people - and offering concrete and specific suggestions and techniques, not the usual cliche drivel. Every parent or future parent should receive a copy of this book. Not a bad resource for non-parents too.

A Godsend and Ideal For All Ages

This book will help many a shy adult as well as people of all ages with Asperger's Syndrome. This book is an excellent navigational tool in decoding the Tacit Social Codes & Rules. Asperger's Syndrome, which is in the autism spectrum includes a lack of intuitive knowledge of these Social Codes & Rules and their accompanying skills. This book reaches people on the spectrum on the cognitive level and helps many to compensate cognitively for what is lacked intuitively. I like the way it empowers parents and educators to realize that not everybody can just approach a peer and make an instant friend. Instead of relying on tired cliches such as constant reassurance at best or criticism/blame at worst, this book acts as a "how to" guide in order to improve social skills. No promises are made and encouragement is given instead. Had this book existed when I was a child, much sorrow and shame might have been avoided. Compassion is the tone of the book and I cannot recommend it highly enough. If I could give this book a higher rating, I would cheerfully do so.

A Grateful Mental Health Counselor...

This book is an absolute must for parents AND teachers who want to guide children through the mastering of essential social skills for building friendships. The all inclusive presentation of means and methods for knowing and implementing The Unwritten Rules will spare many children from the pain of unknowingly inviting social rejection. It's all within The Unwritten Rules...clearly visible to the mind and heart. The authors admirably and impressively answer many children's calls for help.

Mother of a shy child loved this book!

I have watched my child suffer from shyness. This book made me realize that there are some specific skills that she could learn that would help her feel more confident and be more successful in social situations. Instead of saying to her, "Of course they will want to play with you, you're such a great kid," I now give her specific tips, like: "Smile and say hello and say the person's name when you see them" or "If all the kids are playing tag, just join the game, instead of waiting for them to ask you to join." I am so glad that I found this book while she is in early elementary school so we can work on the skills together and avoid some unhappiness down the road. This book offers very practical advice that will help parents guide their children to learn "friendship skills". What greater gift can we give our children? I found Unwritten Rules to be very compassionate towards all kinds of children. I gave a copy of it to my friend who was at her wit's end with her child who has been taking on the role of bully of the playground. She found it helpful too!