The Measured Man: Threads of the Underdeep: Book One
A cosy lit-RPG about competence as a superpower, the radical decency of paying attention to what people need, and a sentient worktable with a secret it doesn't know it's keeping.
Level up. Sew things. Don't die. Mostly the first two.
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Gary Marsh is a tailor. He has opinions about thread count, a tape measure around his neck, and absolutely no business being in a vampire's cave.
And yet.
On an otherwise unremarkable Tuesday afternoon, a catastrophically misfired summoning spell drags Gary - along with his entire worktable - out of his shop in South Wales and deposits him at the feet of Lord Malachar Voss, Warlord of the Underdeep, Drinker of the Ancient Compact, He Whose Name Dims the Torches. The vampire had been trying to acquire a legendary enchanter. What he got was a forty-three-year-old man with a tape measure and several strong views about armour fit.
Gary has no magic. He has no sword. He has no plan beyond getting Malachar's armour sorted before anyone decides to reconsider the arrangement.
But Gary has something the Underdeep has never had: someone who notices the small things. The pauldron that's been wrong for two years. The belt that's been quietly humiliating someone for longer. The four-hundred-year-old doublet that matters more than armour ever could. One by one, Gary fixes them - and in doing so, without particularly meaning to, begins to fix everything else.
Because dignity is the rarest fabric of all.
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