The Black Friend: On Being a Better White Person

By Frederick Joseph

Book Overview

A New York Times bestseller

"A hard-hitting resource for action and change." --Booklist (starred review)

"We don't see color." "I didn't know Black people liked Star Wars " "What hood are you from?" As a student in a largely white high school, Frederick Joseph often simply let wince-worthy moments go. When he grew older, he saw them as missed opportunities to stand up for himself and bring awareness to those who didn't see the hurt they caused. Here, Joseph speaks to the reader as he wishes he'd spoken to his friends, unpacking hurtful race-related anecdotes from his past and sharing how he might handle things differently now. Each chapter also features the voice and experience of an artist or activist, including Angie Thomas, author of The Hate U Give; April Reign, creator of #OscarsSoWhite; and Jemele Hill, sports journalist and podcast host. From cultural appropriation to power dynamics, "reverse racism" to white privilege, this book is a conversation starter, tool kit, and window into the life of a former "token Black kid." Back matter includes an encyclopedia of racism, including details on historical events and terminology.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1536223042
• ISBN13: 9781536223040
• Release Date: January 2023
• Publisher: Candlewick Press (MA)
• Length: 288 Pages
• Weight: 0.78 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.4" x 8.2"
• Age Range: 12 years and up
• Grade Range: Grade 7 and higher

Customer Reviews

A Must Read for all White People

Fredrick Joseph is humorous, kind, and pulls no punches in this beautiful book all about how to be a better white friend. Joseph shares personal experiences, trusting us, the readers, to not only hear but to listen. My favorite chapters were “Certain Things Are Racist, Even if You Don’t Know It”, “So Your Friend Is Racist. What Should You Do?”, and, “In the End: We Don’t Need Allies; We Need Accomplices.” I learned things I shouldn’t be doing: like wearing box braids. (Yeah kinda embarrassed that I didn’t know this was cultural appropriation). Things I should be doing: not just asking if a person is okay after a racist comment was directed to them, but saying something in the moment to the racist person. I also learned that affirmative action is actually used by a majority of poor white people and white women, and that it isn’t the handout I was taught it was. Fredrick (can I call him that?! I feel like a friend now!) also includes an Encyclopedia of Racism in the back of the book that includes terms such as “cultural appropriation”, “Intersection”, “Tulsa Race Massacre” and “Xenophobia”. Throughout the book he also tells us which movies and playlists and artists and people we should know about and how society has failed us if we don’t know them. For the record I didn’t know most of movies or music and only half of the books! Fredrick Joseph also interviews many different marginalized people: activists, media personalities, actors, authors, professors etc. The addition of these voices gave different perspectives but often proved the points made in this book. I am a slow reader but finished this book in just a few sittings. Joseph is engaging, concise and beautifully sincere. I do not take his effort and candidness for granted. This book is a gift to us white people. He wasn’t obligated to relive his trauma just to teach us what it means to be a Black person in America and how we white people can be better people. Everyone would benefit from this book. White people need to read this book.