Overcoming Jealousy and Possessiveness

by Paul A. Hauck

Book Overview

Psychotherapist Paul Hauck, whose popular books have brought help and advice to countless readers, now shows how jealousy and possessiveness--often the most tragic emotions--can be overcome. Applying... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0664243746
• ISBN13: 9780664243746
• Release Date: January 1981
• Publisher: Westminster John Knox Press
• Length: 140 Pages
• Weight: 0.30 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.5" x 4.9" x 7.4"

Customer Reviews

Hey, You, WAKE UP your the problem here!

Now I have your attention I cannot tell you the dramatic difference this little book did for me and my marriage. One day my wife comes up to me and says out of the blue "Im not happy I want to seperate, please pack a bag and get out" I was blown away I did not see this coming at all! This book will NOT underline NOT save your marriage... You will. This is going to take a bit of maturity on your part and also willingness for you to change your behaviors. Let me tell you what I was doing so you dont think I am just some guy who was only slightly jealous. The more I tried to smother her and deny her basic freedoms the more she pushed away from me. The more she pushed away the harder I tried and the more jealous I became. I did things that were so unbelievable I still cant believe I did them. I used to set up a video camera to watch the house while I was at work so I could see who was coming over to sleep with her. I would find excuses to leave work early so I could suprise her and see who she was sleeping with. Nothing ever proved anything. But in my jealous mind any thing I found like a sock on the floor, proved her infidelity. This meant that I would accuse her of sleeping with people, I was nervous of every man in her life because they obvously wanted to sleep with her and I knew it. I wanted to know where she went and for how long so that I could then question her later and see if her stories were the same if she said one thing wrong I used that to accuse her of visiting other guys. I read her emails to see who she was writing and what they were saying about me. Basically I was a mess. When I began to realize this I slowly started to see what I had done wrong and it all was like a light going off. I had not seen what I was doing. I was like a dog that is chained up and is pulling to get a bone, the more I pulled the tighter the coller was getting and the more it choked me. I would also suggest a marriage counselor for you and your spouse or partner. Yes this book will help for people that have domestic partners and boyfriend/girlfriends. If you see any hope in the relationship at all dont give up. You can do it! Dont become another statistic.

Truly Helpful

This book is amazing! I read this book when I was in a relationship that I was always being possessive of my boyfriend, and always would get jealous even if he would look at a picture of another girl. In my mind, I thought that he shouldn't be able to look at other people, because he was my boyfriend. This book helped me overcome my jealousness, just not of my boyfriend, but also for others as well. I find that I am no longer possessive of the guys that I date in relationships now, because this book has helped me understand why I felt the need to act that way, and how to overcome your actions. I would definently recommend this book to anybody who does not understand why they are so jealous and or possessive of their significant others, or also for people who's significant other has told them they need to 'get over it'. Definently MONEY WISELY SPENT on this book!

Helped to Change My Life!!

I drove away a girl that I loved in just 3 short months! I knew that I was kind of insecure and had poor self-esteem, but I had no idea that I was acting possesively and extremely jealous towards her once I finally fell in love. When we first started dating she fell in love with me quickly. She never saw my bad side untill I fell in love with her, then all hell broke loose. Now I thought that I owned her. It started with false jealous accusations, and the constant need for assurance of her love for me, even after my harsh verbal and mental abuses. As her resentment grew, and as I felt her pulling away, I became desparate and acted possesively towards her. All I knew is that I needed her to love me the way she did when we first met. She ended the relationship after three months, but wanted to "still be friends". I could not accept her leaving, and became more possesive and jealous whenever I saw her untill she could not deal with me anymore, and I could not deal with being "just a friend" so we decided not to speak to each other again. I saw myself in this book, and it has confirmed to me that my thoughts and actions were that of a possesive and jealous person. (I blamed my girlfriend or anything else I could think of for causing me to react the way I was.)Just discovering this about myself alone has opened my eyes and started a change in me, but the book has also taught me how to change the way I think. This book uses many true life examples of the possesively jealous person and how they were able to overcome their harmful thinking patterns. I am now learning to love myself unconditionaly first, and that I can change or "unlearn" any negative behavior or thinking patterns that I have learned in the past. I'm sure that I will be ready for the next relationship!

My eyes were opened

...after having problems in my relationship, I decided to visit a local bookstore for some self help. By chance I grabbed this book and began reading, it seemed as though the book was written about me. I never realized that I was jealous and possessive. I could not put the book down until I finished it. This book is so eye opening I have decided to purchase it and keep it with me as support for controling my views as a jealous and possessive person. Thank you Paul A. Hauck!!!!

GREAT BOOK TO OVERCOME JEALOUSY IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Before reading this book, I did not realize I had a problem with my jealous tendencies toward my wife. I thought her loss of feelings for me was due to some external factor. However, this book helped me realize that it is my insecurity that produced these feelings of jealousy and it was only natural for my wife's feelings to change toward me as a result. Mr. Hauck does not pull any punches in telling the jealous person that it is not their partner's fault, the fault lies with themselves. I don't know if I can save my current marriage but I know that the advice I obtained from this book will help me in future relationships. Whenever I start having feelings of insecurity in any relationship I'll be sure to pull this book out to reread. I only wish I had this book 6 months ago before my relationship with my wife changed.