MISSING PIECES Surviving Estrangement/Embracing Life came about as a result of my struggle to locate a fact-based term for the most demoralizing and catastrophic trauma I had ever faced in life--that of being erased from the lives of my children whom I raised as a single parent, and in turn, losing all connection or contact with grandchildren who are now grown and out on their own with little or no knowledge of their grandmother. I have realized that alienation often begins before a divorce is even finalized. Children are subjected to abuse by the more aggressive parent and in time, the child parrots the alienating parent's venom about the targeted parent. Eventually, under constant pressure, children comply with alienating parents' agendas to denigrate and not visit or live with the targeted parents. In these situations, children sacrifice themselves emotionally to the alienating parents' desires rather than dissatisfy them, invoke the alienators' wrath, and experience self-devaluation and guilt. The children's accommodation to an alienator's pressure is complete when children say they hate, do not love, and never again want to visit or live with their targeted parents. At this point, they have taken up the alienating parents' destructive mantra. If the child is of adult age, particularly if they have not been influenced by an alienating parent, the haunting question most asked is, WHY? This volume was written with the express purpose of developing possible answers to that question! The most significant reason I have told my up close and personal story is to give you the valuable insight that "There is nothing new under the sun."--Solomon Ecc. 1:9 If we begin to view all things from a Higher perspective, they can "work together for our good." Rom. 8: 28. Nancee Tanner, author and composer
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