Jane Bites Back

by Michael Thomas Ford

It is a truth universally acknowleged that Jane Austen is still alive today... as a vampire Two hundred years after her death, Jane Austen is still surrounded by the literature she loves-but now it's... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0345513657
• ISBN13: 9780345513656
• Release Date: December 2009
• Publisher: Ballantine Books
• Length: 320 Pages
• Weight: 0.55 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.1" x 7.9"

Customer Reviews

Michael Thomas Ford bites back

I bought copies of JANE BITES BACK for friends. I had no intention of reading it myself; I'm not an Austen fan. But I picked up the book and glanced at the first pages. As I did, I felt my mind fogging - a pleasant feeling, like a dream. Next thing I knew I was all the way up to page 136. Despite my reservations, it is a page-turner; a fun, easy read that's hard to put down. I will continue reading after I attend to this itching on my neck...

A Rollicking Read

Jane Bites Back is a hilarious page-turner.(Full disclosure: I know the author, but only slightly.) Following Ford and his twisted mind on this roller-coaster ride made for a rollicking read--or should I say the rollicking read made for a roller-coaster ride? Either way, I had a blast, and it made me wonder why I've shied away from the vampire genre. Actually, JBB doesn't fall into any genre, fang-related or otherwise. It's a novel/romance/satire and even mystery all rolled into one. I especially loved the author's delicious satire of the publishing game, but Ford jabs at all things romantic, generic, novelistic, and vampiristic. He also does a side-splitting number on a pair of talk show hosts named Comfort and Joy. Jane, by the way, is Ms. Austen, undead in a remote little town in upstate NY, where she's built a fairly normal life, except for her proclivity to inflict in-depth hickeys on the townsfolk every now and then. Prim and proper Jane hates having to do it, but she's hunger-driven, having been turned 200-something years ago by none other than Lord Byron. As Jane Fairfax, she runs her own bookstore and hangs out with the locals, writing a novel in her spare time. When it's published, her little world bursts wide open, bringing more excitement and danger than the poor girl's had in, oh, 150 years or so. Can she handle it? How could she not? After all, the guy pulling her strings has a mind more imaginative than that of any writer I've encountered in a long time. And he's wickedly funny: I cackled my way through half the book, especially the vampire stuff. Still, as a writer reading a writer writing about writing, I related most to Jane as the Austenmeister. For instance, "She herself had become somewhat resentful of newly published books--much as childless women sometimes regarded new mothers and their infants with a mixture of jealousy and despair..." Talk about schadenfreude! Ironically, a book as fun as JBB is a good cure for schadenfreude. How can I possibly resent my friend's publishing success when it's bringing me pleasure? I don't--and I eagerly await Jane Goes Batty. Hm...I just remembered...Batty. Bats. Vampires. Ford hints towards the end that Jane needs to spend more time with "her own kind." Methinks we'll be meeting some of them in the sequel.

A ridiculous concept, entertainingly rendered

Deft storytelling and good pacing enhance this crazy, original tale. "Original" might seem a funny word to use with regard to a Jane Austen-based storyline, but this book doesn't even attempt to mimic Austen's style and that's what makes it enjoyable. It presents Jane Austen, vampire, who has adapted to modern life and sees life's absurdities. She is instantly likable and so is this book. Great fun!

Book 1. Very creative.

Jane Austen is still alive today as a vampire. She goes by the name of Jane Fairfax now. She is the owner of a book store in small Brakeston, New York. No one knows she is Austen or that she is a vampire; not even her friendly assistant, Lucy Sebring. Jane keeps mortal men at bay for fear of becoming attached to one and eventually losing him when he dies of old age. She does not need the extra heartache. This includes Walter Fletcher, to whom Jane considers a close friend and refuses dates with. Jane has kept a manuscript that she now dreams of publishing under her new name. She feels irritated enough that she does not receive royalty checks on the numerous spin-offs of her work, but the continuous rejection notices of her new book is even worse. Jane is about to give up when Kelly Littlejohn, senior editor for a small publishing company, offers her a contract. The book is getting rave reviews and Jane is back in the spotlight. She is thrilled until the famous poet that changed her (unwillingly) into a vampire walks into her store, intending to sweep her off her feet again. To make matters even worse, a noted scholar is accusing Jane of plagiarism. ***** FIVE STARS! This is one of the most thoroughly entertaining stories I have read in the past few years! I feel that the author succeeded in capturing Jane Austen's proper personality, as well as in how the legendary author would have reacted had she found herself an immortal vampire. Michael Thomas Ford has crafted a vivid, charming and witty tale to delight readers of any age. Absolutely fantastic! ***** Reviewed by Detra Fitch of Huntress Reviews.

A modern Gothic novel full of Janeite lore and paranormal hijinx

Jane Austen's novels brim with irony, witticism, and in the end, a gentle reprove or two. It is why I love her writing. Few authors can deliver this dry, deft and wickedly funny style. Michael Thomas Ford is one of them. His latest novel Jane Bites Back is more than a gentle joke, it is a sly wink at the Austen and vampire industry. The clever title alone tells us that Ford has more than a keen sense of humor. The story concept is even better. Nearly two hundred years after her reputed death and burial at Winchester Cathedral in 1817, Jane Austen is actually not dead, but a vampire living in Brakeston, a small university town in upper-state New York. As the owner of Flyleaf Books she watches with irritation and frustration as other less talented writers make a killing off her novels and characters with sequels, spin-offs and absurd self help books. To add insult to injury, Constance, the last novel that she wrote before her turning remains unpublished after two hundred years and 116 rejections. Jane's quiet country life is comfortable but unfulfilling. She has retained her anonymity over the centuries ironically adopting the name of Jane Fairfax, one of her characters in her novel Emma who is also orphaned but a highly accomplished young lady hiding secrets. She enjoys her friendship with her young shop assistant Lucy who reminds her of her dear sister Cassandra and is both flattered and annoyed by the attentions of Walter, a local carpenter/contractor who restores vintage homes and would like to do the same with Jane's heart. Two surprising events change her life dramatically: a legitimate offer to publish her novel, and the return of a former paramour, the mad, bad and dangerous to know poet Lord Byron who seduced and then turned her two hundred years ago. The first she is elated over. The second she reflects upon falling for his entrapment with regret and horror exclaiming in a typical ironic quip... 'Men, she thought. The downfall of women since Adam blamed Eve for that stupid apple. She wondered briefly if it was too late to become a lesbian. "I'm sure they have just as difficult a time of it," she said to the empty room. "Love is dangerous for everyone."' Our Jane is no namby pamby vegetarian vampire. A proper Regency lady she follows decorum, feeds off human blood only to stay alive, and mind you, in the most discreet fashion. Like the unpropitious characters in her novels who are in need of a dressing down, she chooses victims based on their bad behavior, never taking or turning anyone. She also enjoys a few human indulgences such as drinking wine, eating chocolate ice cream, living with a cat named Tom and an infatuation with actor Richard Mansfield, the pattering comic baritone of the D'Olyly Carte opera company, tra la. When her life gets too challenging, she closes her eyes and thinks of England. Light, campy and a bit Buffyish, Jane Bites Back is a modern Gothic novel full of Janeite lore and paranormal hijinx that the "