In My Mother's Mind: A Memoir
In My Mother's Mind covers a span of about eleven years. The primary character in the book, my mother, lived in Florida for twenty-two years after retiring from her career in Ohio. She talked of living in Florida for decades. While Florida was her happy place (not to be confused with Disney World), she was there alone. She had no family in Florida. Her closest family member (me) lived one thousand miles away. Once Mother turned eighty, her mental decline became more pronounced. My sister and I really had no plan for what to do for Mom after Florida. Mother didn't have a clue either. In Mother's mind, she was just going to die there. She took care of her funeral arrangements and planned to stay to the end.
Unfortunately, Mom's plan didn't include dementia or any other age-related issues. She had no plan B. Pulling our heads out of the sand, my sister and I learned in a hurry that plan B had to be formulated and executed now! We were so unprepared.
What about your parents? Do they have a plan B? Do you know their plans? Our mother was not good at communicating, which made this entire process much more difficult than it needed to be. My sister and I learned our lessons well and are trying to put our plans into place so our children won't have to suffer the same fate. Talk to your children. Put everything in writing. Make a plan A, a plan B, and probably a plan C. Your lives will be so much easier if you do.
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