Hard Is Not the Same Thing as Bad: The Perspective Shift That Could Completely Change the Way You Mother

by Abbie Halberstadt

A PUBLISHERS WEEKLY BESTSELLER

Bestselling author Abbie Halberstadt helps women see how God can use the everyday trials of motherhood to radically transform how they view hardship and grow them to become more like Jesus.

"Why me, Lord?"

Amid the toddler tantrums, the mealtime melees, and the backseat blowups, have you found yourself asking God that same question? Maybe even screaming it into a couch...

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0736986758
• ISBN13: 9780736986755
• Release Date: September 2023
• Publisher: Harvest House Publishers
• Length: 240 Pages
• Weight: 0.85 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.0" x 6.3" x 8.3"

Customer Reviews

Spirit-infused encouragement for motherhood's hardships

I have a feeling Abbie is going to ruffle some feathers with this one…but while it may not be well received by all, those who do receive it will find a Scripture-saturated, life-giving admonition to stop “defaulting to victim status” and instead choose to view hard seasons of motherhood/marriage/life as opportunities to throw ourselves on the Lord’s strength and grow more and more Christ-like through the hard. (I also appreciated her acknowledgement that while not all hard is bad, it’s not all good either, and we must be prayerfully discerning about what unnecessarily hard things we allow a place in our lives out of a desire to be “supermom.”) Being neck deep in a hard season of toddlerhood + barely-out-of-toddlerhood, I was pierced deeply by this line: “Rather than viewing toddlers as a hammer meant to smash our wills to mother with excellence, may we see them as a form of holy sandpaper, which smooths our sharp tongues and softens our harsh reactions, leaving behind a pliable heart poised toward the truth of God’s mercy, goodness, and love for every sinner, young and old.” Aside from Biblical truths in every chapter, Abbie not only shares real life examples of challenges she’s overcome by the grace of God, but she also aims to equip you to do the same with practical advice and tips she’s gleaned from the wisdom of others and her own experience as a mom to 10. I love that, while the primary audience for this book is moms, anyone can benefit from reading it. Christ instructs any who would follow Him to pick up their cross; He promises that we will have troubles. HINTSTAB is a powerful reminder that it is Christ alone who gives us the strength to bear our crosses well and worshipfully.

Every Mama needs to read

If you read M is for Mama, you will truly love this book. If you haven’t, do yourself a favor and just buy both! Abbie’s writing is a beacon of Biblical truth shining the light on the messed up mindsets that social media has created of motherhood. Full of first hand and second hand accounts of God’s goodness to lead us as mothers to not try to escape the hard of motherhood we’ve been duped to believe is “bad,” and set ourselves firm on the foundation of the Word of God and allow the sanctifying work of the Gospel meet us and take us higher by doing it HIS WAY. So grateful for this book in our particular season of “hard” for our family that I’m learning isn’t really bad.

Highly recommend!!powerful book filled with wisdom and grace.

This book is great for any mom because motherhood can feel hard most days. This book is full of encouragement, wisdom and grace to change our perspectives and live in God’s promise for our day to day lives!

100% Recommend

Amazing book for mamas or anyone struggling with a hard season. Abbie, the author, speaks directly into what pur generation of mothers needs to hear. Amazing, God-ordained book that will change your perspective & give you a fresh view of motherhood!

So Encouraging

Reading this book feels like sitting with a discerning and caring friend with a cup of coffee on a comfy couch. Abbie shares her lived experience and scripture on almost every page to address many of the hard moments of being a mama, wife, and daughter. Every chapter points to the overarching truth that we can 'consider it all joy' because this hard is helping us grow. Even if we don't see the good on this side of heaven, we can find the ultimate joy when we fix our eyes on Jesus, who for the forgiveness of our sins endured the cross.

A gift of God's grace to Mamas!

This book is a gift of God's grace to mamas. I'm in a new-to-me hard season of motherhood as my husband is now on a rotating shift schedule at work; we're in our first month of night shifts ever, and my three kiddos have been taking turns with sickness almost that whole time. But God is faithful and He sustains. This book has been a true gift from the Lord in this season, and I am incredibly grateful to Abbie for writing it. Praise the Lord for the wisdom He has given her, along with the gift to communicate it. Abbie encourages her readers, with grace and humor, to trust the Lord and find joy and hope in Him during the hard seasons of life and motherhood. She doesn't sugarcoat anything. She made me feel like she's a big sister in motherhood (her kids are mostly older than mine) saying, "I know it's hard. God knows it's hard, and he loves you. He will sustain you and give you Christ's strength to complete the tasks He has given you." I needed these reminders to lean on the Lord, and to remember that caring for the children God has blessed me with is GOOD work, even when it's hard. These are the good works God has given me to do in this season. Abbie's practical advice is so helpful as well, and I'm so thankful for the practical and biblical wisdom she shared.

An Amazing Book

What an encouraging book for all mamas to read!! This book came into my life at the perfect time and has really caused me to take a step back and look at the type of mama I am and the type of mama I want/need to be. Thank you Abbie for such a wonderful blessing of a book!!

Favorite Christian Parenting Book

Synopsis: The title says it all: Life is hard, but that doesn’t mean we have a bad life. This especially applies to parenthood and living as a follower of Christ. Abbie seeks to encourage readers to embrace a “perspective shift,” so we can see God’s goodness, grace and a Christ centered view of parenthood. Abbie speaks of various stages of parenting infants toddlers and teens working for your marriage and forgiveness among a plethora of other subjects. And each chapter is wrapped up with a section written by her hubby for a layer of “team perspective.” My take: Probably my favorite motherhood or parenthood book I’ve read yet, second only to her first book, M is for Mama. Her writing is honest and blunt, even embarrassing and self-deprecating and incriminating for herself, but also kind and laced with love, like Jesus tells us to be. She’s practical, because in the throws of parenting, we want practical solutions, like 10 minutes ago, right. Every chapter ends with her hubby giving a short blurb on his parenting perspective, and I enjoyed seeing a “team perspective” for each topic. This book is incredibly encouraging, and convicting. To live as Christ, we need both.