Final Negotiations: A Story of Love, Loss, and Chronic Illness

By Carolyn Ellis

Book Overview

In this revised and expanded edition of Final Negotiations-a personal account of caring for her partner, Gene Weinstein, and then coping with losing him to chronic emphysema- Ellis reflects back on her experiences as a caregiver, focusing on identity, vulnerability, emotions, and the aging process of an engaged academic. Now, decades later, she reconsiders who she was then, and how she has continued to be affected both by these events and by writing about them. She contemplates how she might act, think, and feel if she were going through the caregiving process again, now.

Taking an autoethnographic perspective, Ellis focuses on her feeling and thinking self in relationships, narrating particular lived experiences that offer a gateway into understanding interpersonal and cultural life. In her new epilogue, "From New Endings to New Beginnings," Ellis describes her changed identity and how Final Negotiations informs her life and her understanding of how she and her current partner grow older together. She hopes her book provides companionship and comfort to readers who also will suffer loss in their lives.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1439917167
• ISBN13: 9781439917169
• Release Date: October 2018
• Publisher: Temple University Press
• Length: 440 Pages
• Weight: 0.40 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.2" x 5.9" x 8.9"

Customer Reviews

Final Negotiations

Ellis' autoethnographic novel graphically depicted details about the relationship she had with Gene who was her professor, partner and who later became her husband. As a scholar Ellis' Final Negotiations offered poignant thoughts, which are often ignored in academia. Ellis' experiences regarding her open relationship with Gene, his deteriorating health and her own professional growth, as a woman and scholar in her field were raw, authentic and made you appreciate healthy relationships, supportive colleagues and the ability to express yourself despite what critics have to say. Ellis' willingness to allow her readers to study how she analyzed her own subjectivity made me consider some of my inner thoughts. I recommend this book to anyone interested in finding hope and balance in all life bring us.

Excellent with real honesty and depth!

This book is so insightful and a wonderful description of what it is like to be primary caretaker for one you love. The text is wonderfully written and moves you deeply into the lives of the characters. Ellis does not shy away from honesty, and in doing so helps us all better face the realities of caring for the terminally ill. On the other hand, Ellis still manages to leave us with hope.