March 7, 2015, was the 15-year anniversary of my mom taking her own life. Not only one, but two suicides have happened in our family. It's a hard truth to swallow. I was wondering if there was something I could have said or done differently. I beat myself up for years, wondering why. Then I turned to poetry as an outlet to deal with the pain of the two suicides and being in an emotionally, mentally, and physically abusive marriage. I also began writing about the trials I faced as a cop and a firefighter. This is definitely the hardest book for me to write. I've shed so many tears writing these poems that nobody would ever see them. Then I realized that there are so many others out there facing the same heartaches that I do.
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