Brother and Sister

by joanna-trollope

No Synopsis Available.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1552784223
• ISBN13: 9781552784228
• Release Date: January 2004
• Publisher: McArthur & Company
• Weight: 1.00 lbs.

Customer Reviews

The drama of identity

This was my first encounter with Joanna Trollope, and I was thoroughly engaged. There are no peripheral characters. Each person has a dramatic journey, captured by Trollpe economically in well chosen scenarios. The structure was a clever one: Natalie and David, with different birth mothers are adopted into the same family, each now feels something is missing in their lives, and they are each closer to each other than they are to their partners. Jealousy and fear of loss entwine, leaving everyone unsettled. The birth mothers' stories are poignant and compelling, as is the struggle and growth of Lynne, the adoptive mother. Natalie's partner and David's wife feel understandably left out of their search, but struggle with their own issues of identity, intimacy and control. For me, this novel provides an argument for open adoption, at least giving the children a narrative of their own beginnings, and the birth parents some information about the progress of their children if they wish it, or at best a completely open situation where everyone stays, to some extent, a part of each other's lives. But then, that wouldn't make a very interesting novel.

Good news: Trollope back at her best with pen in fine fettle

Whew, what a relief that this is a good novel, the sort of quality experience I expect from Trollope since her last novel (Girl from the South) was inferior. This one, however, is mighty fine reading and particularly involving. Definitely THE story for those interested in adoption from whichever view you want (adoptee, adopter, married to, sibling with, etc.). Wonderful book replete with the details, texture and ungovernable emotions of family life. Finest kind of reading. I have to say I learn from Trollope's novels and I mean that in a good way. When it comes to the family and our human hearts, Trollope has insights that entertain, sure, but which also are useful. Mind you, I hate that touch-feely stuff! but I love Trollope's novels.

My Real Parents

When my daughter was little and would get angry with my wife or I, she'd often say, "I want my real parents." As a person who had adoptive grandparents, I found this subject to be fascinating. Trollope's book answers the question about just who our real parents are. If there is a lesson, what I got was that our real parents are the ones who give us love while we're growing up.The issues in the book are riveting. How our sense of family can be threatened by change and impacts each member of the group shines through. I found it particularly significant that as David and Nathalie find birth mothers Carole and Cora, the reality of these women is a shock to how they had been imagined. Equally fascinating is the dynamic within Carole's family as her husband Connor is supportive and son Martin short circuits finding that he is suddenly not the oldest of his mother's sons. The characters are all deep. However, the story does take unexpected turns that like an unwanted half brother were not entirely welcome. Nathalie's live-in boyfriend Steve's affair seemed strange to me. We are introduced to him being a stable and supportive mate who then experiences lethal doses of insecurity. The same is true for David's wife Marnie whose insecurity over David's connection to his adoptive sister Nathalie causes anxieties and odd behavior. That the search then results in the ultimate schism of the bond between brother and sister is even less welcome. Satisfying elements of the story are with the adoptive Lynne and her working through her feelings and the scene with son David where he confirms his bond with his adoptive mother. I also enjoyed the exploration into Cora's world and the social situation that brought her to give up her baby.Overall, I found this an enjoyable reading experience. The issues are weighty. It made me really picture the feelings of adopted children. I reflected on my own family and how it might be different if adoption results from the death of birth parents rather than social circumstance. Trollope's pacing and command of language are masterful. The setting of locations in Great Britain makes us feel as if we'd been there. Enjoy!

The ripples of adoption

British author Trollope writes sharp-witted novels of middle-class families in domestic crisis. Her characters are too complex to be entirely likable - or dislikable, and her plots test their inner resources and shake cherished modes of thinking.Adoption and the search for birth parents provide the catalysts for change and upheaval in "Brother and Sister." Nathalie has always proclaimed that her biological origins are of no interest to her; that being chosen by your parents is better than just being born to them. But when her 5-year-old daughter, Polly, is diagnosed with a minor, but hereditary ear abnormality, Nathalie is jolted.Nathalie has always exuded confidence (though she flits from job to job) and insisted on her independence, to the point of refusing to marry her live-in partner and the father of her child, Steve. But is her vaunted independence just an inability to commit herself? " `I just felt awful, lost,' " she tells Steve, that night. " `I thought - I thought, what else don't I know?' .... `I suddenly felt I was in a space. A void.' "The person she turns to in this moment of crisis is her adopted brother, David, the only one who will "understand," since he, too, is adopted. But David is appalled, and dead set against upsetting everyone and everything "good." " `I need to,' " Nathalie insists. " `I need to stop being this person of my own creation and find out what really happened. I need to stop feeling so separate.' " And Nathalie needs more. The big sister, who has always gotten her way, she needs David to join her in the search; to find his own mother while she finds hers. David at first resists - the idea terrifies him. But then, with the urging of his wife, Marnie, he relents.David, happily married, father of three, owner of a thriving landscape business, values stability. His avocation is chess and as the novel proceeds we see that in times of stress he loses himself in the game. To him it's a haven of intellectual challenge with identifiable rules, far from the mess and unpredictability of emotional ructions.And the brother and sister quest causes nothing but emotional ructions. The adoptive grandmother fears being supplanted by these alien "real" grandmothers. She fears being supplanted as a mother, her life nullified. Steve and Marnie feel left out, rejected. The bond between the adopted siblings has always been threatening - their closeness not only that of siblings, but of adoptees, willing to declare that no one but the other can understand their points of view. And, of course, they are not blood relations.Steve and Marnie bring their own characters to bear on the situation. Steve, a successful designer with his own firm, likes everything in its place. He reigns in his passion for control at home, but it costs him. Nathalie's separateness eats at him - he needs to feel needed. Marnie, giving up her nursery school after the birth of her third child, feels her own control unraveling. Trying to run her family on the same

"The abandoned baby lives inside each adoptee."

In this tension-filled domestic drama, Joanna Trollope shows how the adoption of two children, now adults, have affected all the families involved--the birth mothers and their later families, the adoptive parents and grandparents, and the adoptees themselves, their spouses, and their children. Nathalie, the partner of Steve Ross and mother of their child, has always considered it an advantage to be adopted, to be "chosen," but when her young daughter Polly needs surgery for a condition that may be inherited, her own adoption becomes an issue for her. Asking "What else don't I know about where Polly's come from?" she suddenly comes to a life-changing realization: "I want to be like people who know where they come from." She and her brother David decide to search for their birth mothers. The rippling effects of the decision to search for birth mothers dominate this carefully constructed novel. Nathalie's adoptive mother, not surprisingly, is devastated that both of "her" children need to find "other" mothers. The birth mothers, by turn, have created new lives of their own, each dealing with her "lost" child in her own way. Nathalie's husband, David's wife, and their children are also affected, not least by the fact that Nathalie and David choose to share their feelings with each other, rather than with their spouses. As the ripple effects continue, other characters, even including employees, are drawn into the emotional vortex, and unexpected complications send the action in surprising directions with new twists and turns.Trollope reveals the inner lives of her characters through beautifully realized dialogue, and she pays particular attention to the details of personality and domestic relationships. The reader is quickly drawn into the action and empathizes with the characters, who seem realistic, though they are not fully developed. In fact, we learn about each one only what is necessary for the author to illustrate the myriad effects of adoption on the adoptees and the people who love them. The themes dominate, controlling both the action and the characters themselves. A vivid domestic drama with an unusual subject and characters, the novel shows us how relationships are tested and tempered. Ultimately, both the characters and the reader come to a new appreciation of the complexities of love and families. Mary Whipple