Bitter Chocolate: Child Sexual Abuse in India

By Pinki Virani

A book that challenges our notions of family honour and morality Sometime, somewhere, the conspiracy of silence around Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) in Indian homes had to be shattered. This path-breaking book"the first of its kind in the country and subcontinent"attempts to give that sexually abused child a powerful voice. It provides damning disclosures about men, and some women, in middle and upper-class families who sexually abuse their children, then silence them into submission. Based on studies, reports and investigation, this book reveals that a minimum of twenty per cent of girls and boys under the age of sixteen are regularly being sexually abused; half of them in their own homes, by adults who have the child's trust. In Bitter Chocolate, journalist and best-selling author Pinki Virani travels across the country to record the testimonies of the police, doctors, child psychologists, mental health professionals, social workers, lawyers and the traumatized victims themselves. The book opens with an account"brave and devoid of self-pity"of the author's own experience. Going beyond blaming, Pinki Virani then proceeds with her insightful analysis of the issue in three notebooks. The first spells out what constitutes CSA, why and how this happens, its devastating after-effects which haunt the victims as they grow into adulthood. The second notebook describes these effects through two real-life stories of women who were betrayed as children by men of their family. The third provides practical solutions on how to counter CSA, including a framework involving the law, the parent and their child. A special chapter addresses adults who have never before disclosed their sexual abuse as children. Plus: a nationally coordinated helpline. Accessible yet comprehensive, Bitter Chocolate is written for the young parent and guardian, principal and teacher, judge and police, lawyer and public prosecutor, teenager and tomorrow's citizen.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0140298975
• ISBN13: 9780140298970
• Release Date: April 2000
• Publisher: India Penguin
• Length: 248 Pages
• Weight: 0.64 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.0" x 7.8"

Customer Reviews

The betrayal of trust, the abuse of power

The book on CSA for India. With an Indian context. Must be read by every Indian. The betrayal of trust, the abuse of power, denying the crime, the pressure to keep silent, blaming the victim, minimizing the crime, and ultimately forgetting. This book will keep you awake nights. But, be forewarned to be forearmed. Please read this book. Pinki Virani has written a book that about a subject that no one wants to talk about, or even acknowledge - child sex abuse (CSA). See - we even have an acronym about it so that we can talk anonymize the gruesome crime and hide the true horror that it inflicts on children. The book is divided into three parts. The first part deals with the betrayal of the trust and the perpetration of the crime in what is the safest haven for a child - the sanctity of his or her home, by the very people supposed to be their protectors: father, mother, uncle, aunt, grandparent, elder brother or sister. The second part describes in some detail the effects of CSA through two real-life stories. Part 3, titled "notebook three" is perhaps the most useful. Some of the sections in it are "prevention than cure", "dealing with disclosure", "child protection units", "exit cycle", "to the victim", "healing yourself". There is a list of books for further reading, and a list of helplines in 8 cities. The book is short - and even though you would wish that such a book were as short as possible, it really needs to be much longer. There are so many aspects of CSA that need to be examined, brought to light, and explained that a book several times its size may be insufficient. The psychology of the perpetrators, the psychological devastation it wreaks on the victims, the psychology of the society that refuses to acknowledge the enormity of this crime, the state of the existing legal framework, and so much more. These issues are touched upon this book, but this topic begs for more coverage. This book is a start, a depressingly frank start, but it needs to be followed up by much more. And above all, this book must be read by everyone. We owe it to ourselves.

Adore this book

This is a great tool for those who work with Indian child sexual abuse survivors, in order to understand how the culture causes families to brush such a horrific act under the rug. It's also great for other Indian survivors who may feel alone and don't have an outlet to talk about what happened. You are bound to have a lot in common with at least one of the stories in this book. It touches on the after-effects of promiscuity, prostitution,sexual dysfunction, mental illness and re-victimization that result from being a survivor, which are things that traditional Indian culture can't admit exists among us..What's sad is that things like promiscuity/"acting out" or getting anxious when touched are some of the signs of child sexual abuse. Families are more concerned about preserving their "honor"/reputation than figuring out what is causing their kid to act how they are. I just wished that Pinki spent more time on the "exiting the survivor cycle, and gave examples of how people accomplished that.It's one thing for an Indian to recognize how traumatic child sexual abuse is, but a lot of survivors are continuing to unconsciously re-victimize themselves without knowing how to successfully get out.