Beemer: A Novel

By Glenn Gaslin

Book Overview

A satiric novel of life in Southern California follows the adventures of Beemer Minutia through twenty-first-century Orange County.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1569473293
• ISBN13: 9781569473290
• Release Date: July 2003
• Publisher: Soho Press
• Length: 288 Pages
• Weight: 0.98 lbs.
• Dimensions: 8.8" x 1.0" x 5.8"

Customer Reviews

A Book like a Big Gulp

Marx, bless his heart, believed that the Future was communism, an idea whose time would inevitably follow and replace--in some trans-historical Hegelian fashion--capitalism. Of course, when the revolution came a century and a half later it was televised, but not by state-run media; it was Marx's own great idea we watched being smashed to rubble in Berlin, accompanied by the warbling of (alas, poor Karl! the final insult) David Hasselhoff. Beemer Minutia, the hero of this perfect-in-every-way debut novel, saw this revolution live on TV too, and at a very impressionable age. With History officially over, the Future belonged no longer to nations, but to individuals. In a dramatic come-from-behind, the Future turns out to be capitalism after all, and Beemer Minutia wants his share: Beemer™, the archetypal Brand Me, with a media empire of books and movies and maybe a talk show and, in case you get thirsty from it all, Beemer™ soda, which we are led to believe will taste a lot like Mountain Dew ™, only better. So start like'n it. The business plan for Beemer™ includes an equally driven girlfriend (the impetus for a lot of car-top sex), a black-ops advertising agency, an appallingly well-organized group of pre-teen domestic terrorists, a boy-band of questionable masculinity, and lots and lots of ice-cold super-sized fountain soda. Unfortunately for Beemer, the funding never comes through. But like all business visionaries failure is just a stumbling block, propelling him to greater, more profound endeavors. From identical metropolises of 1.1 million people to a desert periphery where some still search for an `authentic' America, author Glenn Gaslin hints at an alternate or future U.S. of A. now increasingly familiar. His cynical view of suburban sprawl is fresh, but not new. The world of Beemer Minutia is a prelude to well-known literary futures: a child born in Beemer's bulging Orange County might find herself coming of age in the militarized burbclaves of Neal Stephenson's Snow Crash, and having mid-life cosmetic surgery in the Shinjuku imagined by William Gibson. Gaslin is not simply imitating, however. His America, Beemer's America, feels like it is almost here. And the writing is original, too; each page brings precious, collectible sentences (like the combination of the US highway system and Mountain Dew bringing about a state of "transcontinental meditation"). Equal parts commentary, irony, and perhaps even auto-biography, Gaslin's novel goes down like all 44 sweet ounces of a Super Big Gulp™--leaving you sucking, slurping, then finally chewing on the ice.

This CAN happen

A cautionary tale, told in the form of a heavily-exaggerated satire, that, after looking around middle America for a while, seems none so exaggerated. These people are real. This absolutely CAN and HAS happened.Funny enough to depress. Real enough to induce laughter. Far out enough to be real. What does this mean?

The OC

A wicked satire of Edge Cities, where gas stations are the size of shopping malls, and shopping malls are the size of nations. The descriptions of suburbia alone are worth the price of admission. This is the novel McG should have based his television show on. So don't watch TV, buy this book and read it instead.

The real, super-size deal

The word "Pynchonian" gets tossed around a lot when it comes to literary phenoms these days, but BEEMER (TM) is the real thing. This novel is an answer to where you go when you reach the end of the road, what you do when irony fails you and all the old modes of dealing are suspect. The language is fluent and stark at the same time, bringing a new life to what most writers treat as background noise.And it's funny. Because, God knows, in a world like this, we need a few laughs...

261 pages of Americana

This is a fun read. Newbie author Glenn Gaslin takes loving aim at the wonders of America, while poking fun at absurd cultural institutions like monster SUVs, militant gated communities, ... boy bands, giant convenience-store beverages and the emerging, soon-to-be-dominating power of the next generation.The story centers around Beemer Minutia, a young man alternately living and hunting for the American Dream. All he wants to do is drive and discover, but he's willing to settle down for love. As long as it's in the biggest, most extreme housing development ever.For the record, my favorite lines are:"Ask him what kind of name's that: Beemer.""Hey, what kind of name's that?""German."The story if fun and the cover is pretty. Buy it. You'll like it. If not, the cover is still pretty.