I take the reader with me on my journey, as I pack all my belongings, and finally leave my abusive home aged twenty-one. But although I am away from my controlled home environment, I cannot escape my bad memories. I am still living the terrible nightmares of my violent abusive childhood, which are embedded in the deep recesses of my mind. The horrors of my past affect my daily struggles to fit in to society. Unable to cope with normal life outside my dysfunctional family home, I turn to drugs and alcohol to try to cope. I drift from place to place trying to find sanctuary from my past, but end up down a path of self-destruction, and into a courtroom. A string of failed relationships ensues, resulting in one girlfriend getting forcibly removed from my house by a friend with a shotgun. A roller-coaster of emotions, and an unexpected sexual encounter, which went against everything browbeaten into me by my father, puts me over the edge, and into a tormented existence of guilt and self-loathing. Will I ever find the happy ending I have always yearned for, or will my past overshadow my future?
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