Assess ability to be a GRUMPY OLD MAN Lev 3 Certificate Units 7 and 9: A Laugh-Out-Loud Spoof Qualification to Recognise and Honour the Grumpy Old Man ... Old Man – Level 3 Qualification Series)

By Gerry Attrick

This big-size workbook is witty and unique; it perfectly captures the characteristics of a Grumpy Old Man and presents them in the format of a realistic but entirely spoof Level 3 Qualification. Not only is it funny to read, it also provides the means to assess the 'level of grumpiness' of a Grumpy Old Man against laugh-out-loud benchmarks. Workforce surveys predict there will soon be a national shortage of Grumpy Old Men, so act now and use this workbook to develop someone you know, who shows potential, to become fully competent in performing the role. The qualification is underpinned by the 10 core Grumpy Old Man Values: 1. We make an unnecessary fuss; 2. We are nosey; 3. We cause chaos and confusion; 4. We speak our mind no matter how cutting; 5.We are impatient and argue; 6. We are mystified by simple technologies; 7. We can quickly judge people by their appearance alone; 8. We wear beige coloured clothes; 9. We waste our doctor's time; 10. We inundate our MPs with trivial complaints. This workbook details Units 7 and 9, which cover: BEHAVE CANTANKEROUSLY, and PLAN MISERABLE HOLIDAYS. It provides witty performance criteria with humorous real-life examples, including conveying sarcasm in foreign languages, creating long queues at checkouts, using foreign currency in UK shops, cultivating ear and nose hair, being outwitted by obvious scams, writing offensive complaint letters, mastering the art of doddering, and deploying a shopping trolley in a way that endangers the public. Apart from giving more than a hundred hysterical performance criteria designed to assess grumpiness, the book also contains top tips for reaching the required 'grumpy' standard, actual examples of grumpiness and tightfistedness, satirical advertisements, spoof learning materials, guidance on assessing a Grumpy Old Man's competence plus a Record of Achievement to chart his progress, a Grumpy Old Man Personality Test, and Achievement Certificates to award on completion. Other books are available in this qualification series, each with different themes and content. Please be warned - the qualification is a parody of the worse perception of a Grumpy Old Man, and as such, it is not politically correct.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: B0F5QG5D8Q
• ISBN13: 9798280668478
• Release Date: April 2025
• Publisher: Independently published
• Length: 59 Pages
• Dimensions: 10.0" x 0.1" x 8.0"