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Sarcasm is My First Language. Profanity is My Second.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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When I Look at You I Know the Wheel is Turning but the Hamster is Dead: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Tell Me Not to Do Something and I Will Do It Twice and Take Pictures.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Anywhere You Are is a Hostile Work Environment: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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The Main Ingredient in Company Meetings is Paranoia: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Hmmm, That's a Bit Too Harsh. Let Me Put "Lol" at the End of It.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Smell like Hidden Motives: College Ruled Notebook - Better Than a Greeting Card - Gag Gifts For People You Love
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I Think My Guardian Angel Drinks.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Was Diagnosed With OCCABD: Obsessive, cursing Compulsive, Angry, Bitch Disorder.There is No Cure: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Will Ignore You So Hard You Will Start to Doubt Your Existence.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Why Use Words When Rolling Your Eyes Will Do?: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Don't Get Enough Credit for All I Do Sober: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Four Out of the Five Voices in My Head Think You're an Idiot. The Other One is Deciding Where to Bury You.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Are as Helpful as an Ulcer: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I May Not Be Perfect but at Least I'm Not You: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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My Energy Level is Equal to a Sloth on Benzos: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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My Job Provides Me With Health Insurance, Ulcers, Anxiety, and Depression.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I'm Not Sure if I Have Free Time or if I Forgot Shit.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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If You Eat Well, Get Good Sleep, Exercise, and Drink Plenty of Water You'll Die Anyway.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Like This Job Only Marginally More Than I Like Being Homeless: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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True Friends Don't Judge Each Other, They Judge Other People Together.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Doing a Good Job Here is Like Wetting Yourself While Wearing Dark Pants. You Get a Warm Feeling, but Nobody Else Notices: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Friends Are Like Christmas Lights They Hang Together, Half of Them Don't Work and the Other Half Aren't So Bright.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Today's Forecast: Hot Temper With Scattered Sarcasm and a Shitstorm: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Revenge Sounds So Mean. I Prefer to Call It Returning the Favor.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I'm Sorry I Called You an Asshole: College Ruled Notebook Better Than a Greeting Card Gag Gifts For People You Love
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Wearing All Black Today to Mourn the Loss of My Motivation.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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We All Know Someone Who Speaks Fluent Shit: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Just Got a Booty Call From Life. Apparently It Wants to Keep Fucking Me.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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If My Job Sucked Any Harder I'd Orgasm: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I'm in Love With My Bed. We're Perfect for Each Other, but My Alarm Clock Doesn't Want Us Together. That Jealous Whore.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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The Best Nicknames Are the Ones Other People Don't Know They Have: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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My Coworkers Are Stupid: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Love Being Me. It Pisses Off All the Right People.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Really Feel Like I Have My Life Together When My Bra and Underwear Match.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Take Super Hot Showers to Practice Burning in Hell.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I'm Having One of Those Days Where My Middle Finger is Answering Every Question: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Are You Always This Stupid or is Today a Special Occasion?: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Used to Have Super Powers, but My Therapist Took Them Away.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Are as Helpful as a Broken Crayon: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I’m Not Addicted I’m Committed: College Ruled Notebook | Better Than a Greeting Card | Gag Gifts For People You Love
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Work Is Just Something I’m Doing Until I Win the Lottery: College Ruled Notebook | Better Than a Greeting Card | Gag Gifts For People You Love
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Politically Correct: a Term Used for Whiney Overly-sensitive Pansies Who Need Everything Sugar Coated: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Get Through the Week by Reminding Myself I Can Always Quit: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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Revenge is Beneath Me. Accidents, However, Will Happen.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Are as Helpful as a Hemorrhoid: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Call It Profanity. I Call It Sentence Enhancement.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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You Look Like Something I Drew With My Left Hand: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I Used To Crastinate, But I Got Good Enough To Go Pro.: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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I'm Quitting to Pursue My Dream of Not Working Here: College Ruled Notebook | Gift Card Alternative | Gag Gift
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