The DNA of Relationships

by Robert S. Paul, Gary Smalley, Michael Smalley, et al.

Book Overview

"Life is relationships; the rest is just details." We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Dr. Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships:... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0842355308
• ISBN13: 9780842355308
• Release Date: September 2004
• Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers
• Length: 216 Pages
• Weight: 1.20 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.9" x 6.3" x 9.3"

Customer Reviews

un buen libro de ayuda

Los autores son conocido consejeros cristianos norteamericano. En este libro establecen el valor central de las relaciones en la vida y significado del ser humano. Abordan tres relaciones principales: relacion con Dios, relaciones con otros y la relación con uno mismo. Estas tres relaciones se articulan unas con otras. Los autores tratan, tambien, acerca del circulo de elementos que destruyen las relaciones. Para ilustrar lo principios que pretenden compartir, van a través del libro tratando con las dificultades de cuatro parejas. Describen sus problemas, los analizan, y dan pasos de "tratamiento". Por favor, tenga en cuenta dos aspectos: 1) Los enfoques tratados no son todos necesariamente correlativos a las costumbres, estilo de vida y relacionamiento de la gente hispana. Sepa que encontrará distancias culturales en la lectura (ya que fue escrito originalmente en inglés para la cultura norteamericana). 2) Este es, específicamente, un trabajo enfocado en la relacion matrimonial, y no en el "ADN" de LAS relaciones humanas en general... El título ni el subtítulo de la obra aclaran ese particular. Si usted está buscando un libro de relaciones humanas en general, que le sea util para con sus amistades, trabajo, la iglesia, etc... hay otros materiales. Este es un buen libro de ayuda para parejas, y bien se beneficiaran estas si lo leen y aplican sus principios. Un excelente libro cristiano, recomendado para comprender y mejorar la comunicación y las relaciones es: Como Relacionarse Mejor: Manual de Tecnicas Para Desarrollar Relaciones Mas Satisfactorias, Dinamicas y Duraderas (Serie Recursos Ministeriales) Tambien:Los Cinco Lenguajes Del Amor: Como expresar devocion sincera a su conyuge (Five Love Languages, Spanish edition)

EL ADN DE LAS RELACIONES

LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE "EL ADN DE LAS RELACIONES " IN CD'S OR ANY ONE OF THIS KIND OF MATTER (SELF ESTIME HELPER) IN CD OR CASSETTE, PLEASE....

Mejore sus relaciones

Este es uno de los mejores libros, si no el mejor, que e leido sobre las relaciones. Este libro me a ayudado mucho con mi matrimonio. Finalmente entiendo algunas cosas que siempre me frustraron. Este libro tambien me ayudo con mis amistades en el trabajo. Toda persona debe de leer este libro.

Practical Lessons for Relationships

In The DNA of Relationships, Christian author and seminar leader Dr. Gary Smalley offers solutions to some of the key problems that couples face in their marriages. He offers his book as a response to the high rate of failure among marriages in North America. He notes that the divorce rate among Christians equals that of non-Christians. Although Dr. Gary Smalley authors the book, he draws on the expertise, lessons and experience of his family and associates that are involved in the Smalley Marriage Institute and Smalley Relationship Center. His sons, Michael and Dr. Greg Smalley, along with associate Robert Paul, contribute heavily to the substance of the book. The wisdom learned about marriages from marriage seminars called Marriage Intensives conducted by the Smalley Marriage Institute provide the foundation for the themes of the book. Dr. Smalley claims that certain recurring patterns in marriages undermine the quality of the relationship and can devastate the marriage. He calls the most destructive pattern the fear dance. Dr. Smalley writes that this is a destructive dance that couples routinely act out due to core fears influencing their actions. Identifying and eliminating the fear dance becomes a primary goal for couples. Another lesson that Dr. Smalley teaches is that the apparent problem for couples is rarely the real problem. He advises couples to look beyond the surface and the arguments to the feelings behind the words. This is a process that he suggests will contribute to better communications and fewer arguments between spouses. Readers will learn what Dr. Smalley calls the "power of one." He writes that individuals must learn the power of their own choices, including choices about thoughts, feelings and actions within a relationship. The power of one includes the responsibility to care for oneself and to take charge of one's life-not giving up one's choice for happiness and fulfillment to another person. He encourages couples to create a safe environment where both spouses are able to share openly, to be secure and comforted. Effective communication requires a safe, welcoming environment, claims Dr. Smalley, and this leads to an energetic and vibrant relationship. An important principle Dr. Smalley teaches in the book involves a win-win attitude within a relationship. He encourages spouses to never see themselves as on different teams against one another, because a marriage or family is one team. The only desirable outcome is for everyone to win. Dr. Smalley argues that within a marriage if one partner loses an argument, for example, both spouses still end up losers in the situation. Throughout The DNA of Relationships, Dr. Smalley uses many examples from his marriage and his associates' marriages. For every major point he makes, he offers several illustrative and practical examples for the reader. Perhaps the most influential chapter in the book is the final chapter in which Dr. Smalley recounts his hea

A relationship expert discusses improving martial dynamics

By virtue of his many books, videos and speaking engagements, Gary Smalley has gained a nationwide reputation as a "relationship expert." Early on in this latest book, he explains its title. We are all created with a certain "relationship DNA code . . . made up of three simple yet profound strands: 1. You are made for relationships. 2. You are made with the capacity to choose. 3. You are made to take responsibility for yourself." But the book quickly moves to a different metaphor, of a relational dance in which one's steps or moves are predicated by one's fears. The anecdote introducing this metaphor is about husband and wife "Dan and Celeste." Precariously unemployed Dan has just received an out-of-state job offer, but Celeste vehemently resists moving away from her friends and extended family. The "surface problem" or conflict is about whether they stay or go. But "the external problem is rarely the real problem." Rather, conflicts are usually rooted in core fears: for women, usually some variation of fear of disconnection; for men, "of helplessness or feeling controlled." The rest of the book explains how to "break the rhythm of the Fear Dance" by taking responsibility for oneself and learning "new dance steps." Though the strategies apply to any close relationship, the major intent is improving marital dynamics. Like Smalley's previous books, THE DNA OF RELATIONSHIPS is engaging, largely because he sprinkles his teaching points with anecdotes in which he presents himself as the jerk who has taken years to learn lessons he wants to pass along; the "relationship expert" is just a regular guy. His style is also evident in this book's clear outline; for example, chapter 4, "The Power of One: Take Personal Responsibility" includes "six steps to take control of your emotions and reactions to life." For extra measure, each chapter ends with a one-page "One-Minute Review" of the major points. An appendix titled "Identify Your Core Fear" contains a six-part questionnaire, helpful to anyone looking for insight into how and why a particular person gets under your skin. And buried in chapter 10 is mention of a free book study guide and a "relationship evaluation test, which we have found to be 90 percent accurate with married couples," both available at www.thednaofrelationships.com. The voice throughout THE DNA OF RELATIONSHIPS is vintage Gary. (Lest you forget, his name unnecessarily is printed at the top of every left page.) But the title page lists three co-authors: his two sons, Greg and Michael, and Robert Paul, "who developed much of the original concepts." In working with these men --- what they call the "Relationship Revolution Team" --- Gary looks to the future, challenging the younger generation to catch the vision to reverse the distressing trend that born-again Christians have a higher divorce rate than agnostics. --- Reviewed by Evelyn Bence