Our Own: Adopting and Parenting the Older Child

By Trish Maskew

Book Overview

Drawing on the author's experiences and interviews with dozens of adoptive families and professionals, this handbook of older child adoption covers attachment, family adjustment, remedies for... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0966970128
• ISBN13: 9780966970128
• Release Date: September 1999
• Publisher: Snowcap Press
• Length: 283 Pages
• Weight: 1.42 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.0" x 6.3" x 9.3"

Customer Reviews

Balanced between reality and optimism

Reading this book affirmed for me that we were doing the right thing by not adopting an infant. This book is chocked full of in-your-face warnings, but also celebrates your choice to adopt. Very informative. Easy to read writing voice. Great buy! :) I would also reccomend Waiting for You: An Heirloom Adoption Journal for My Future Child. It is an expectancy journal that works well with older children. If you're adopting, God Bless your adoption journey!

Informative and Honest

This book was purchased along with Adopting The Hurt Child byKeck. My husband and I are planning on adopting older siblings, andwe were looking for resources to prepare us as much as possible. Unlike Keck trying to make a statement about the system our children find themselves mixed up in, Trish Maskew provides a realistic approach to the actual adoption and parenting of older children. She gave us a realistic perspective on the children in a positive way. She informs you of many possibilities in a way which does not scare you into changing your mind. Surprisingly, after having read her book, we are more determined that this is what we want to do. We also feel confident that we are fundamentally educated and prepared. She provides many up-to-date resources in Appendix form, and also gives real-life examples of how to make a not-so good situation better. She provides numerous examples of problem solving ideas, along with very informative reference information about many of the problems Our children face. Many of her comments about sensitive comments people can make hit home with me, and I appreciated her down-to-earth language. I found this book a very easy read, and finished it in a couple of hours. I highlighted numerous points throughout her book to share with my husband. I also noted numerous suggestions she makes for us during the journey to adoption. I would ABSOLUTELY recommend this book to anybody considering adopting older children. I am extremely glad that I found her book amist the scarce up-to-date resources.

Authoritative and Awe-inspiring

Trish Maskew interviewed me for this book, and I waited, heart in my throat, to be disappointed, saddened, or enraged. What a wonderful surprise I received! This book is heartfelt, unbelievably well researched, honest, encouraging, validating - the only piece that I found discouraging was that on FAS, and I have provided my comments on that section to the editor (so I await the 2nd edition ;) I edit a newsletter for adoptive families and have requested permission to reprint a few sections of this book. I read a proof copy and then read it again in its final version. This book is right on the money. I cannot stress enough how important it is for potential adoptive parents to read this title and prepare themselves for significant changes in their lives. Personally, I (with my husband) adopted older children - ages 9 and 11 - and I have lived just about every vignette presented.

A must read - realistic but positive

I love this book. I have 6 kids, 2 born to me and 4 older child adoptions. One set of sibs came home three years ago, the other last August. This books makes me laugh and cry at the same time. I read so many stories that were just like mine - and I've never found this anywhere else. The book is well organized and covers at least briefly almost any topic that could come up during an older child adoption. The balance betweeen domestic and international experiences is also helpful, as info on international older child adoptions is really scarce. The author also does an excellent job describing and putting into realistic perspective the emotional issues these kids come with - although I think a lot of the material is probably most relevant to school aged children as opposed to toddlers and preschoolers. In my opinion, throughout her book she remains positive and encouraging. I don't understand the previous reviewer's comment that this book is depressing - far from it to me. It was inspiring and realistic, but also reinforced the truth that the joys of parenting older adopted children are beyond measure. Seeing a hurt child heal and truely smile with joy from the bottom of her soul, perhaps for the first time in years, is an experience that makes all others pale. Having this book available is like having a personal coach at your side. Thank you Trish Maskew!

Awesome! A "must read" book for those about to adopt

In preparing for our older child adoption I picked up this book for my wife and I. Of all the books I'd read this one was the most helpful in terms of preparing us for the diverse range of emotions and problems that would be involved. The author takes you through the experiences of other adoptive parents and helps you question your own desire and ability to adopt. Adopting an older child isn't for everyone and her point is to introduce the reader to that reality. If you are thinking of adopting, read this book.