The Baby Book: Everything You Need to Know About Your Baby from Birth to Age Two (Revised and Updated Edition)

I'm kind of surprised at some of the negative reviews of this book. Peole keep saying that co-sleeping and attachment parenting encourage undisciplined children, but if you read the follow-up book, "The Discipline Book," you'll see that's not necessarily the case. If a child knows she can trust you (through early experiences), she will be much less likely to have discipline problems later. Anyway, I got "The Discipline Book" before "The Baby Book" and was pleasantly surprised that it encourages setting limits APPROPRIATE TO THE CHILD and sees discipline as a continuum and not a one-time, spanking kind of thing. Their method of childrearing just seems totally natural to me, the kind of things mothers and fathers did for thousands of years before the medical establishment and society started butting in on childrearing. I think the book is a must for any new parent!

To read a book that reinforces my instincts! I am only sorry I did not buy this book in the first few weeks of motherhood. I read books that gave all kinds of advice that just didn't seem right. I have never let my baby "cry it out" even though parents, in-laws, and grandparents have all at some point told me I'm spoiling my child. At five months old, she is happy, well adjusted, and easily falls asleep on her own. Mothers and fathers take note-attachment parenting works!! I can actually sense how much trust my baby has in me. This book will be especially helpful to parents of colicky babies. It replaces the feelings of frustration and helplessness with compassion and understanding. I read a few negative reviews from those who found the Dr. Sears to be extreme. Attachment parenting can be incorporated into every lifestyle. I'm a stay at home Mom, but I don't ALWAYS wear my baby in a sling. And though I slept with her for the first few months, she now sleeps in her crib, and takes a morning nap with me. It's just a matter of knowing your baby and following his/her cues rather than following some ridiculous formula that is supposed to work for all babies. Yes, the book almost always puts the baby first. Isn't that the way it's supposed to be? Every aspect of parenting should be cherished rather than looked upon as an inconvenience. For those who truly want to bond with their babies-this is the book for you! And just a note to new, first time moms: I spent many nights in the first few weeks crying right along with my colicky baby. So many well-meaning moms gave me advice. Because I was new at the whole thing, I always doubted myself. Was I ever going to have a happy baby? Was she ever going to sleep through the night? What was I doing wrong? Well, any mom who has practiced attachment parenting for a few months will tell you this. After a few weeks, when friends and family tell you you're holding the baby too much, you're spoiling the baby too much, you should let the baby "cry it out" instead of feeling unsure, you will laugh to yourself. Because you'll know inside. You'll know that the parents who are not wearing their babies, not holding their babies, not soothing their babies, not cuddling through the night with their babies, are really missing out on moments they'll never have again. That's when you'll know how wonderful attachment parenting is.

There is not much that one can say that hasn't already been said. This book has stood the test of time; other know-it-all one-size-fits-all infant care books have not.

One observation that I have made is that you will not find this book promoted by popular baby stores such as "Babies R Us". Having visited many branches of such stores, I have never seen this book promoted in the book section. It dawned on me why. Dr. Sears' approach is decisively anti-consumerist. He strongly recommends breast feeding - nothing to buy here. He strongly recommends co-sleeping - no crib or sheets to buy. He recommends the use of a baby sling or baby carrier - OK, you can find such items at "Babies R Us", but this is meant as a replacement for a much more expensive stroller.

Bottom line: following the recommendations in this book means going against the grain set by product-dispensing corporations that are the center of a society centered around consumption. Read this book and think long and hard about what you believe and what you value in the role of a parent, and tune out all the noise around you including well-meaning family members.

As a 4th-time-around mom, my only regret about buying this book in 1993 was not buying hardcover--our copy is completely dog-eared and falling apart from use! Back then, as first-time parents, my husband and I happened upon the Sears' book and were so relieved to find a parenting guide which combined medical expertise with extensive personal experience and, on top of that, actually reinforced the use of our instincts as parents. It's extremely comprehensive and well-organized. We love the presentation of "the facts" balanced with the narrative/personal examples which Mrs. Sears has contributed. We are often complimented on how out-going, well-adjusted and secure our children appear to be. Time and again, we find ourselves giving a great deal of credit to "The Baby Book" for guiding our parenting choices. Reading the reviews on this book here, I found the majority of readers couldn't say enough wonderful things about it...so many "5 stars"!!! Then there were a few "1 stars." These people seemed very concerned with the supposed "guilt trip" Dr. and Mrs. Sears were unloading on them. I guess I just didn't see it...my husband and I have coined the term "convenience parenting" for those wishing to parent "the easy way" (ie. sleeping through the night at two months after birth, the "cry it out" philosophy and the very notion that a baby can actually be spoiled by too much attention!) Any way you look at it, parenting is NOT an easy venture, but at the same time is so incredibly important...maybe a little bit of well-placed guilt isn't such a bad thing. Granted, everyone's parenting situation is different. Because of this, there will never be a perfect parenting book...glean what you can from this one. So you can't do 24/7 "baby wearing" because you both work--have your child-care provider read that chapter!!...etc., etc. Take what the book says with a grain of salt and tailor it to your needs. At any rate, both my husband and I have gained a great deal from "The Baby Book." As a physician, he readily recommends it to his new-parent patients. And I buy it for every baby shower I attend. I would truly like to thank the Sears for all they have given us through this book...how wonderful it must be to have him as a pediatrician! Give this book a try...I doubt you will be sorry!

My wife and I have used this book as a reference over and over again and I am always amazed at the relevance of the Sears' advice. But rather than go into specifics about the book's virtues (plenty of people have done that below), I would just like to comment on some of the negative criticism that other users have given this book. First of all, let me make it clear that (obviously) everyone is entitled to their opinions; I'm not trying to say that anyone HAS to like this (or any) book. But if you are going to publicly critique it, it's only fair that you present the information accurately and comment on real shortcomings, not imagined ones.

A reader from Dallas states: "Use this book with great caution. If you want nightly habitual feedings, crying for response, and other stressful habits built into your child, use this book." That's pretty scary sounding, but let me present another scenario: My wife and I have let our child (now two years old) share the bed with us since he was born and it has been an unmitigated pleasure throughout. Except for rare occasions, he has always slept through the night, has never needed a bottle to get to bed, and has never shown any signs of being unusually "needy". Also, my wife did not have to get out of bed to breastfeed him when he was still feeding at night [Newsflash: Pretty much ALL babies feed during the night when they are very young infants - don't blame that on co-sleeping]. Now that my wife is pregnant again, we have transitioned him into his own room with absolutely no fuss. In contrast, my sister has never let her baby sleep in bed with her and the baby used to get up twice a night for a year and a half. The point is this: there is no right or wrong way, and there are no guarantees; babies are all very different, they're not little robots. We let our baby sleep with us because we LOVED it, and we will do it with our next one. The Sears state very clearly that you should do what you are comfortable with and that there is no right or wrong way. They just ask people to be OPEN to the idea of co-sleeping and to question those who so confidently state that it is wrong.

[By the way, those who condemn it have zero scientific evidence to support their claim. Think about it: Modern day humans have been around for 2.5 million years. For 99% of that time we have been foragers and hunter-gatherers. Do you think we would have survived if sleeping with your children was "wrong"? Foraging and hunting tribes don't carry around cribs with them.]

Anyway, my point is that the Sears definitely do NOT say that there is only one way to put your kid to sleep.

A reader from New York asks: "Will co-sleeping wane in popularity as parents tire of sleeping with twin 5 years olds and an 8 year old and word gets around on the difficulty of ever getting the children out of your bed?"

That's a good question. I have a few questions of my own. Have you ever tried it? Do you know for a fact that it is difficult to get kids out of bed and into their own beds? Do you think that the Sears really suggest that all of your kids should sleep in the parents' bed, regardless of age? Did you see the part in the book where they say that you should do what you are comfortable with and what makes the most sense to you?

The bottom line is that the authors clearly and refreshingly state that mothers and fathers know a lot more about raising their children than they are given credit for. Rather than telling prospective parents that YOU MUST sleep with your baby or YOU MUST breastfeed, the overall effect of their book is to say YOU CAN sleep with your baby regardless of what society tells you and YOU CAN breastfeed if you want to maximize your baby's health and the bond between mother and child. Of course, no one HAS to do anything, but it's nice to have alternative sources of information.

Thanks for listening.